Thursday, November 16, 2017

Regrets! #1

When I woke up this morning, early, actually well before sunrise, I scanned my email, as I regularly do. I deleted those that held little interest this morning and then went back and opened those from friends or blogs I usually read or news feeds to scan the headlines. There I found an email from a friend and reader of this blog, Richard Rosen. He forwarded a link to a newsletter article, suggesting it was something I could have written.

Long story short, Richard was on the right trajectory. I've touched on some of the topics in some of my blog articles in the past. So, I thought I'd share some of the points made in the article with you with the hope of stimulating some open discussion. Remember, everyone has their own perspectives on these kinds of topics. There are no right or wrong ideas.

The title of the article was "What You Can Learn From Other People's Regrets." The author, one Dr. Joseph Mercola, who publishes the Mercola Health Newsletter. But, more specifically Dr. Mercola expounded on the regrets people have as they approach death. He gathered his information from a book titled, "The Top Five Regrets of the Dying," by Bronnie Ware, a former palliative care nurse who interviewed many dying patients during her career.

I'm not opening this up from a negative, we're all dying, approach. Rather, as a way to do something NOW to avoid these regrets when we reach our "user expiration date," someday.

So, here is the #1 Regret people have:

"Not having the courage to live a life true to oneself but rather doing what was expected."

Bronnie Ware says this about #1: "The No. 1 regret is a valuable reminder to not give up too many of your dreams to please others (or conform to conventional standards). It is very important to try and honor at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

What say you?  

Live free and be happy. EH


CinemaNoir said...

Sunday AM

First, Ed, how went your eye-surgery? Since you're reading this I assume it went well, as it should have.....

Now, regarding the #1 regret from folks passing from life to whatever lies ahead for us all, I'll rephrase that regret into a question for each of us: "How well did I achieve my own expectations for myself?" I am the only person qualified to answer, just as only you are qualified to answer that question. Meeting, exceeding or failing to meet the expectations of others, regardless of intensions, is not material. We answer only to ourselves! Jim R

Ed Helvey said...

Thanks, Jim --

Friday was only pre-op appt. to measure and prepare me for the upcoming surgery - which you may already know - is a walk-in & out deal. The actual surgery is only about a 15 - 20 minute procedure. That's actually scheduled for December 1st (left eye) and December 8th (right eye).

On your comments about Regret #1 . . . you are absolutely correct, sir. While we owe gratitude to our parents, siblings, friends, educators and anyone else who cared for us, taught us or stood by us, in the end, we are not accountable or obligated to them nor they to us. Each of us was granted a gift called life. How we use gifts is up to us. We show gratitude to those who I mentioned, but ultimately, in the final accounting - we are responsible for our own lives and choices and only accountable to ourselves. Hopefully, each of us ends life free, happy, fulfilled, with peace of mind and the least number of regrets.

seeinsilver said...

After years of planning, I almost missed the boat. I've been retired and full timing going on 2 years now but I've had a hip replacement which helped with my mobility but still suffer from chronic back pain which limits my ability to get out and go to places I want to go. I also have vision lose in one eye due to macula degeneration. If the other eye goes, that is the end of my driving days. Don't put off living your dream one day longer than absolutely necessary. There may not be a tomorrow. Many of my friends died before retiring or shortly after without getting to enjoy the savings of a life's work. That was a powerful motivator for me to move forward with my plans even when I was unsure of my decisions. I wish all the best of luck with your life plans. Enjoy today, you can always go back to work if you run out of money!

Ed Helvey said...

Excellent points, Jimmie.

As you indicated, we only have now, for sure. Tomorrow is neither promised nor guaranteed. We all have some kind of burdens and conditions we carry with us through life. But, ultimately, we are only accountable to ourselves and God/the Universe. So, live your dreams now, don't keep putting them off. I too have lost many friends either to premature death or becoming disabled. I consider every day a gift. Pleasant and safe travels and live free and happy.