Adopt
the pace of nature: her secret is patience. - Ralph Waldo
Emerson
Today
is Day 66, Tuesday. Time just seems to be passing, but as Emerson
suggests patience is the key here. So, four days have passed since my
last article. But, there has been some positive change occurring.
Day
63, Saturday, was basically another day like the other days of
the preceding week. Massive fatigue, no energy and still no ability
to swallow food or liquids. I was continuing to lose weight. I
attempted to be a little productive, but I don't feel like I was.
However, even though I'm dealing with some “brain fog,” probably
caused, at least partially, by not getting enough protein or carbs, I
did come to the realization that I had to find a way to stop this
downward slide.
So,
Day 64, Sunday, I reviewed the comprehensive printed
information I was given and the in-depth conversation I had with the
Cancer Center nutritionist. I decided to make a shopping list of
foods that would work with the exact circumstance I found myself in.
It was a long list and even included a couple things that might be
considered “junk food,” but they were highly caloric and I need
calories.
Carolyn
had to go out that afternoon and I asked if she wouldn't mind
shopping for me. So, I gave her my credit card and thanked her in
advance. Late that afternoon she returned with all but a few items on
the list. I immediately broke into a few of the items and, indeed,
with care, I could ingest the food items. (I had already discovered
that oatmeal and some soups would go down with care). Additionally,
the food and fluids I requested tasted good, too. Was I turning a
corner?
Day
65, Monday, a major move forward. I was able to consume
everything I tried from my shopping list and ate more food and
consumed more liquid on Monday than I had for the entire previous
week and a half combined. Not only that but, I actually stopped the
weight loss and was regaining a little of that weight by the next
morning.
I
also went to the local Walmart with Carolyn at the wheel and walked
through the store finding the few items that were not available when
Carolyn shopped for me the day before (Sunday). It was exhausting,
but exhilarating at the same time.
I
also felt motivated to actually be minimally productive during the
rest of the day when I wasn't resting. The energy level still hadn't
returned and the massive fatigue still came in waves knocking me
down. But, even with that, I still felt “energized.” Attitude!
It's all about attitude.
Day
66, Tuesday, today, was a very good day. The massive fatigue
still persists along with the lack of energy. However, I felt more
motivated today. Again, I experienced some productivity. This is
important to someone like me, a serial entrepreneur and a nomadic
traveler by nature.
However,
about halfway through the day, after doing a few things and resting,
but eating more and drinking more, I came to a realization. My
problem with swallowing food and liquids was lessening. I don't mean
I was back to normal, but as long as I was careful and observant of
the size of my bites of food and being sure to chew them well before
swallowing, they were going down without being stopped in the
esophagus and the accompanying discomfort and, sometimes, pain. The
same was true of swallowing liquids. I could do more than just take
tiny sips.
This
is such a marked improvement over what I've been experiencing for the
past couple of weeks. If I would have had the energy, I would have
jumped for joy. Again, I consumed at least as much as I did
yesterday, possibly more.
So,
what this is telling me is that I made a good decision to make that
shopping list. And, thanks to Carolyn, I'm now stocked up for at
least the next couple weeks. I'm sure there could be some setbacks,
however, I'm feeling pretty certain that I am turning a corner in
this recovery process, perhaps a bit faster than I expected. I'm
expecting another good day tomorrow, may be better than today. My
stomach feels comfortably full. Of course, it has shrunk over the
past two months or so, but I'm able to eat and drink and enjoy it
more than any time in the past several weeks.
So,
onward and upward. That's all for today. Live free and be happy. EH
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