Anxiety and Anticipation

The time is drawing near. I'm full of anxiety and anticipation at the same time. I, both, love and dislike these feelings I'm experiencing. No! This is nothing new. I go through this every time this particular time draws near. Life seems to be full of so many paradoxes.

So, what is the “time” I'm speaking of? Could it be the holiday season? Could be, but it's really not. Could it be the end of another year and the beginning of a new year? Could be, but it's really not that either. So, what is it?

It's the feelings I always get as I'm preparing to venture out “on the road again.” Whaaaat? But, you're a self-described “professional nomad.” It's what you do. Why are you dealing with anxiety and anticipation at the same time, you say?

Carly Simon wrote and performed her song, “Anticipation” in 1971. The first lines go . . . We can never know about the days to come, But we think about them anyway. And, the late Wayne Dyer said, The truth is that there is no actual stress or anxiety in the world; it's your thoughts that create these false beliefs.

So, why am I feeling both anxious and anticipatory at the same time?

On The Road Again . . .

Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway
We're the best of friends
Insisting that the world be runnin' our way - Willie Nelson

Audio Version available - see player below

Hi Everyone . . .

I know it's been a while since I've posted anything new here. Frankly, I needed a short break. There were just a lot of things going on and my poor little brain was getting fried.

Additionally, I was devoting time to straightening out the space I had been occupying at my friend's place in WV where I was based camped for way too long. And, I was devoting more time to completing some modifications and changes to “My McVansion” before heading out on the road again. I ran it past my mechanic and we found a few minor things that needed some tightening, replacing or refilling. I wanted to make sure it was road worthy before I started wracking up the miles again.

Just about the time I was finally ready to roll out the door, one of my few remaining clients (from my 50+ year career in the recording & voice-over business) called with a new project. Actually, the 3^rd or 4^th complete update and redo of one of his training programs. I had to record the program at his offices in Fairfax, Virginia (where I have an office at my disposal whenever the need should arise). But, the scripts wouldn't be ready and cleared by his lawyer for another week and a half. So, one more delay, but certainly worth it. Dave and I have been working together on his programs for over 35 years.

Photos-of-the-Week #229 A Touch of London Town in the Desert, Lake Havasu City, Arizona, April 2015

So, here we are at the London Bridge. Yes! That London. But, No! Not in Merry Old England.

It was in the early 60's when this little wide spot in the Arizona desert across the Colorado River from California became a small town and the site of a unique undertaking. The historic London Bridge from the British city by the same name was purchased from the City of London. It was painstakingly disassembled and each component carefully numbered and shipped to the U.S. . . READ MORE

This Is The Life?

Yes! It is THE Life . . . for this wandering vagabond. It was a rainy day during my drive yesterday from northwest Nebraska to the national forest campground I called home last night. It was not a great day for taking photos and frankly, while rain is a very necessary commodity, especially in "bread basket" farm areas like Nebraska, but while other parts of the country are in drought, some parts of Nebraska pastures and fields looked like lakes.

This morning I woke up to a gorgeous sunny, cool, crisp (about mid 40's) morning at my national forest campsite. There are some real advantages to being a "senior citizen" like the lifetime National Park Golden Eagle pass. For a one time investment when you're over 62 of $10.00 you get free access to all U.S. national parks. In the last couple weeks that $10.00 investment has saved me about $60 at national park gates. Additionally, it saves typically 50% from camping fees at park service operated campgrounds. So, last night I got my site for $5.50 including electrical service. Thus, I used my small electric space heater to stay warm, dry and cozy. My "tin can tent" was like a small cabin.

Here's my campsite with My McVansion comfortably nestled in the trees.

And, my personal chef, lil 'ol me, set up my outdoor kitchen and whipped up a breakfast of fried eggs, mesquite smoked sausage, Swiss cheese, my favorite spices, a bagel and cream cheese, a banana and some Greek yogurt - and started off with a nice hot cup of British blend, black tea. It was a meal fit for a king (British tea and all that sort of stuff).

Add to this the sounds of classic 1950's rock & roll playing forth from my Sirius satellite radio. Neil Sedaka, Connie Francis, Kingston Trio, lots of doowop and other favorites from my early teen years. How perfect can life be?

Well, it might have a bit nicer if I had one or two friends to share the experience with. The occasional companionship of a person of the opposite gender would be nice. However, I'm not the least bit lonely. I'm living exactly the lifestyle I want to live. No, I'm really never lonely. I'm in contact with friends from all over the country and overseas. My buddy Brian in New Zealand, my buddy Dave from Falls Church, VA who rendezvoused with me in Sheridan, WY the other day, my friend Richard, in Sebastian, FL, my friend Tommy in Port Charlotte, FL, my friend John (and his wife, Sharon) in Cherokee Village, AR. This list could go on and on. Between those I keep in contact by phone, text, email and in-person visits along the way, who has time to be lonely.

My buddy, Dave, is in Jackson, WY today and actually, about the time I'm composing this article is floating down the Snake River on a raft. I crossed the Snake River twice on this trip so far.

Unfortunately, while my lifestyle is generally idyllic, there are always a few things of a negative nature, like the deaths of two of my long time friends while I've been on this trek. Jim Smith was a recording engineer who worked for me around 1980, I helped give his recording career a kick start. After he left me, I referred him to National Public Radio and gave him a letter of recommendation - that led to his becoming the technical director of "All Things Considered" and "Morning Edition," the two NPR flagship programs. His career moved onward and upward from there. Unfortunately, a battle with cancer claimed Jim at the young age of 66.

My 35 year friend, broadcaster, speaker, student and advocate of humor, Art Gliner, passed away a week ago after dealing with the cruelness of dementia for about eight years. Art was a young 80 years old. A self-made successful, generous. caring, sharing man if there ever was one. A person I had the extreme privilege of counting among my wealth of friends. As a legacy, Art shared his brother Richard with me, so I have the privilege of having another friend and a constant reminder of Art. 

My youngest sister continues to deal with the cruelness of an abusive, sociopathic ex-husband and a troubled 16 year old daughter and the Virginia court system. Her problems have been going on for over 16 years. I've attempted to assist her as I have been able, but unfortunately her situation is so extreme and complex and I'm such an inconsequential part, there is little I've been able to do. I feel terrible for her and her situation, but there is no simple solution and, of course, throwing piles of money at lawyers and the problem might have some impact, but she doesn't have it nor do I. And, I wish I could say she is the only person going through these kinds of issues. But, I can't! I've met too many people over my life who've been in similar situations. As the old saying goes, "Life isn't fair."

But, for this wandering vagabond, This IS The Life! I'm free to come and go as I please. Everything this morning is near perfect. Well, except for the occasional noisy ATV that goes by or a freight train going by about a half mile away on a freight line. Most of them seem to be hauling coal, a politically controversial commodity these days. But, regardless of the controversy, it's currently necessary to keep this country and economy operating.

So, after I get this article posted I'll be cranking up the "thrusters" on my "metal magic carpet" and heading east across the vast pastures and fields of manna that are Nebraska on my way to another of our bread basket states, Iowa. When I reach eastern Iowa, I'll be stopping in to visit my speaker friend, Jolene Brown and her farmer husband, Keith, at their farm for a short visit. Yet, another visit with another amazing couple and amazing careers. All things being equal, I should arrive at the farm on Monday and I'm looking forward to it. I get to experience another part of Americana, the great family farm that has been the backbone of this country.

I wish you all the freedom you can muster and all the happiness you choose to experience in your life as this vagabond rolls on down the highways and byways of America.

A Sabbatical

Okay! I know you've been wondering if I died and blew away. I'm still here. Well, "here" being relative. I've been meeting such amazing people both old friends and new people. I've experienced some great music, some art and many places that have been blowing me away. Like I just told a friend of mine in an email, I've only had a tiny appetizer of the treasures the western part of the U.S. holds. I don't think I've even seen the tip of the iceberg. But, I'm falling in love. I can understand why there are so many vandwellers and RVers who gravitate to this part of the U.S.

So, yes, I've been reasonably busy. I have so many things to write about. I have thousands of photos to go through and edit. The memories are building at a space age speed. Okay, and I'll admit it, even with all the topics I want to write about, I've been experiencing a bit of writer's block. Like I said, it's not because I don't have anything to say, but because my days have been so full and there has been so much to experience and enjoy that it takes my writing energy away.

So, I decided to grant myself a short sabbatical from writing. But, get ready because I'm working at getting things cranked up in the writing department again.

Currently, I'm camped a mile high outside the tiny (I mean TINY) town of McAllister in southwest Montana. From my van workstation where I'm composing this article I'm overlooking a long, beautiful valley where it almost looks like snow has fallen (none up here) and the mountains on either side of the valley are snow capped. I actually have 360 degree views from here. 

I'm camped on the 20 acre mini ranch of my friend Anne, a nature photographer/videographer, falconer and conservationist. Anne is also the first news camera woman going back to the early 1970's. Her career continued through the 70's, 80's and 90's and opened the door for other women to enter the traditionally men's profession. Her experiences and career are amazing to listen to. She was with CBS and ABC networks. She worked with presidents, Congress and even filmed an interview with Yasser Arafat.

Like I said, I'm spending time with the most amazing people in the most amazing places. So, get ready for what I hope will be lots of great new stuff coming up pretty quickly.

Oh yeah! And don't miss tomorrow's Photo-of-the-Week. I usually don't have pictures of myself. But, this photo was taken of me and it blew my mind when I saw it. I'll tell you the story when the photo goes up tomorrow. This is going to be my new profile photo.

More coming soon, stay tuned to this same channel (blog).  

My McVansion Update: Prepping to Leave Los Angeles

Today is the seventh day since I regained possession of My McVansion. It was finally discharged from the Heart (Engine) Hospital last Saturday. Since then, I've been driving it around the area to regain confidence in the "heart."

On Monday I drove it to the nearest Walmart with a tire center to have them repair or replace the brand new tire (of two) that I had installed the day before the engine failed. The tire went flat after picking up a load of metal debris on the shoulder of I-405 (or The 405 as they call it out here) just 15 miles from my son's place in Hawthorne. To recap, I drove the van on the interstate shoulder at 10 to 15 mph after the engine failed on the way up the mountain. It was 84 miles from the western side of the mountain to go through the Tejon Pass at 4,200 feet from the San Joaquin Valley into the San Fernando Valley. . . READ MORE

Reunited, At Last!

At long last, My McVansion and I have been reunited. Yes! Today I picked up my home and my wheels at the engine hospital. It is 55 days today since I admitted the patient to the engine hospital for a "heart" rebuild.

It has ended up being one huge misadventure, but that's a part of what life on the road is all about. If you recall, last year about this time I was in Georgia when the right rear wheel bearing went out and had damaged the axle. With thanks to one, David Hair, who actually performed field surgery on My McVansion in the Home Depot parking lot in Blue Ridge, Georgia. I was then able to bring the patient to its regular general mechanical practitioner in Winchester, Virginia.

This particular engine problem threw everyone a curve. I'm not going to go into details now. Wilson, the head surgeon at the One Stop Engine Rebuilding and Auto Repair business, told me that most of the vehicles that come in for engine work display two major issues. One issue is that the engine was run without coolant and overheated. The other is that the engine was run without oil in the crankcase. My McVansion had not been overheated and the temperature gauge was right on the nose. And, the synthetic oil I always use was right up to where it belonged and the oil pressure was perfect.

Yet, something caused the engine to fail and whatever it was kept itself hidden. After the engine was fully rebuilt once and then partially rebuilt a second time, everything was running fine except for one serious glitch. When the engine reached operating temperature and was run over 1500 rpm, the exhaust manifolds would glow cherry red. Meanwhile the rest of the engine was running at the appropriate temperature. This problem has been eluding us for weeks.

There was some half serious talk about calling Ghost Busters or a priest to perform an exorcism on the engine. I seriously had several people around the U.S. with considerable expertise in combustion engines sending me thoughts, ideas and suggestions as to how to find the "demon." My old college friend, Greg Cordano, back in my home state of New Jersey was losing sleep over this problem. He sent me nearly daily emails with suggestions as to where the problem might be.

I have to commend Wilson and his terrific team of ASE certified engine technicians. They are a dedicated and tenacious group. I know there were times when they just wanted to throw in the towel. But, they hung in there. Wilson was calling in favors from other friends at other shops that specialized in parts of the engine that weren't his forte.

Finally, Wilson took the van to a fellow who specializes in the electrical/electronic aspects of modern engines. He had very expensive, specialized equipment and training in all the sensors and the main computer that runs modern engines. I consider him an automotive neurosurgeon. The demon was finally revealed and vanquished.

So, today, I picked up My McVansion at about 1:30 PM and brought it back to my son's place where I've been enjoying spending time with my son. But, I feel I have reluctantly overstayed my visit, though my son and been extremely gracious and supportive. Pete is in the process of packing and moving his stuff to storage since he has to move. Getting my van back was becoming urgent. Thankfully, it seems to have happened just in the nick of time. He has another place already, but it won't be ready until May 1st. So, he's taking a short sabbatical from his job and heading to Turkey and other parts of eastern Europe on one of his global (albeit, short) treks.

I spent the afternoon happily reinstalling my electronics - navigation, communication, entertainment and dash cam documentation equipment, routing and dressing wires and power and getting the cockpit ready to venture back onto the highways and byways of America. It will probably be the middle of next week, around March 4th or so before I actually hit the road.

But, I am one happy camper this quiet Saturday evening and I feel "complete" again. Yeah! I know, a van is not a warm, cuddly companion (certainly something to be desired), but it is my home and my "magic carpet." And like Dorothy said as she clicked her ruby shoes together, "There's no place like home."  

Photos-of-the-Week - From Sea to Shining Sea and Gulf to Lake, America the Beautiful, 2014 - 2015

From Sea - The Atlantic Ocean

I've been sitting here in sunny, warm southern California enjoying the time I'm spending with my son as I await the recovery of My McVansion from it's "heart attack" (engine failure). I began recapping the past 12 months of travel My McVansion and I have enjoyed and experienced. I have literally been from sea to shining sea and from the Gulf to the Lakes. What a wonderful year. . . READ MORE & SEE 3 MORE PHOTOS

Things Are Looking Up For My McVansion

If you look over the fence, below and left of the street
 number, 12501, you can see My McVansion's roof.

Today is the eighth day My McVansion has been undergoing "treatment" for its "heart attack." I admitted it to One Stop Engine Rebuilding a week ago Tuesday. Wednesday of last week, the master engine surgeons began the procedure of disassembling and rebuilding from the basic engine block up, a completely rebuilt "heart" (engine) for My McVansion. Eight days after they began, the heart of My McVansion is firmly seated in its cavity in the front of the patient.

For all practical intents and purposes, the engine is almost all new except for such things as the engine block and the camshaft. . . READ MORE

The Good, The Bad, But There Is No Ugly Today

So, the good is that while My McVansion has suffered an automotive heart attack, I'm fortunate enough to have close family in an idyllic location, especially considering the weather conditions back at my eastern base camp in Keyser, West Virginia. The temperatures there for the past several days have been in the 0-10 degree range at night with 25 to 50 mph winds creating wind-chill temperatures in the -10 to -20 range. Additionally, they have had a nominal blanket of snow on the ground. . . READ MORE

California, Here I Am!

Yes, I am in sunny, warm (finally) southern California. But, not without challenges getting here. I'll recap the travels in another post devoted just to the mostly uneventful trip other than my eight day stay in Cherokee Village, Arkansas. But, this is the view from where I am composing this article today.

This is from the small yard, but adequate for my son, Pete's, (and currently, my) needs in the city of Hawthorne, California, one of the cities that makes up what most people call Los Angeles, the "City of Angels." His small house is actually a guest house located behind the small main house that faces the street. It's actually very quiet and secluded back here. I can't see anyone and no one can see me. . . READ MORE

2015 Trek #1 - California, Here I Come, #1 Huntington, West Virginia

I FINALLY made it on the road yesterday, Monday, afternoon at 4:30 PM. Whew! It sure does take a lot of time and energy to get packed and rolling when planning on an indefinite period of time and a variety of climates. . . READ MORE

2015 Trek #1 Departure Date Is Imminent

The much awaited (by me) target date for departure on the first trek for 2015 is Monday, December 8, 2014. Yes, I'm calling it the first 2015 trek because it's so close to the new year and the vast majority of this trek will be during 2015.

The van preparation is coming along. It's been hampered a bit, unfortunately, by colder weather and a bit of snow and very cold rain, not to mention some serious wind from time to time. But, I keep progressing. A number of projects have already been completed (alterations, changes and additions) and while the current list of items still looks daunting - it's really quite doable. . . READ MORE

Pimping - Oops, Make That - Primping and Prepping My McVansion For The Next Major Trek.

Well, as the old saying goes (from Robert Burns poem), "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry." And that's true of my plans to be on the road heading west by October 1st. I had a project from a very long-term and very good client come in about 2 months later than it was supposed to. So, while I could have managed the project on the road, I was dealing with at least one new vendor and that made me a bit more wary.

During parts of the summer and the fall, especially during this two month delay in my departure, I've been getting little things done on the van, making a few changes and modifications and so on. It's like having a house and a vehicle. There's always something that needs to be done. The only difference here is that the house and the vehicle are one and the same. And, as I had some extra time, I'm doing some of the projects I planned for a little further down the road. . . READ MORE

Breakfast Fit For A King - King Of The Mountain, That Is

A short while back I received an email invitation from fellow Vandweller, Dave Campbell. Dave is based in Virginia, a little bit south of Washington, DC. Dan is not retired or a full-time vandweller, but he's looking forward to a time in the foreseeable future when he'll be in a position to make the change from his current full-time employed lifestyle to one where he has more control over his life.

As I said, Dave emailed me an invitation to join him at the ten acres of lush forested, mountain top land for a get together and first time meeting. The ten acres are Dan's answer to leaving the congestion, complication and maddening crowds of the U.S. Capital and the region surrounding it. . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #173 Padre Island On An Overcast Day, Near Corpus Christi, Texas, September 2003

Just another day at the beach. This is a somewhat lonely section of the Padre Island National Seashore near Corpus Christi, Texas. There is something about an overcast day on the beach - with a lonely seagull. The weathered pilings just add to the starkness of this setting. . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #170 - Little Sodus Bay, Fair Haven, New York, June 2014

As I stopped My McVansion and took this picture I could visualize a scrawny, pimply-faced, 15 year old boy enjoying one of the thrills of his life. That thrill was skimming across the surface of this bay at about 30 miles per hours on water skis, towed behind a sleek tow boat. That scrawny 15 year old boy was, yours truly, ME! . . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #164, The Mohawk River and Erie Canal, The Village of Ilion, New York, June 22, 2014

The photos don't get any more current than this one. I shot this and the second photo (a "selfie") while sitting in a small picnic shelter on the shore or the Mohawk River. This portion of the Mohawk River just happened to also be a part of the Erie Canal. About four or five miles downstream (to the east of this location) is Erie Canal Lock #18. I took photos of part of it earlier today. . . READ MORE

From 900 Square Feet to 5,000 Square Feet to 50 Square Feet

Here is an interesting juxtaposition for you. Can you imagine downsizing from 5,000 square feet to only 50 square feet? That is living in 1% of the largest amount of space I had ever occupied.  Just think about that for a few minutes and see if you can wrap your mind around that contrast. . . READ MORE

My McVansion Food Shopping List

My last article offering three tips for simplifying included comments about how I've simplified my diet as I travel in "My McVansion." Madmike, a blog reader, sent in a comment that he would like to see the list I have developed for my personal diet and tastes while traveling the highways and byways of America. So, to follow up on that article and to respond to Madmike's request, here is my shopping list.

Ed Helvey's My McVansion Travel Food & Sundries Shopping List . . . READ MORE