Happy Anniversary . . . to ME!

Anniversaries are like birthdays: occasions to celebrate and to think ahead, usually among friends with whom one shares not only the past but also the future. Zbigniew Brzezinski

Today is the one year anniversary of the beginning of a new life for me. On August 18, 2019, a Sunday morning, without any warning, a fireball of cancer came out of the universe and struck me down. There were no serious symptoms or anything that would have given me an inkling of what was to befall me and how my life would be forever changed.

I was having a normal morning. I was a bit fatigued, but that was about all. I took care of my normal, very regular routine “business.” Everything was fine. I then went for a morning walk, another part of my daily routine. I believe I got about a mile and a half in. But, when I returned to my friend's, Carolyn's, house, I felt pretty wiped out. That wasn't normal. But, I still had no idea there was anything seriously wrong.

Well, within an hour or so, I was unconscious, on the floor. The first time I had any recollection of what had happened was when I started to regain consciousness and I was on my bed. I have no idea of any details of my collapse or the actual amount of time. It might have been seconds or minutes. I'd never experienced anything like this before in my 74+ years of life. Carolyn and her grandson were hovering over me trying to help me regain consciousness and comprehend what was happening.

Chris, Carolyn's grandson, a professional EMT who just happened to be visiting his grandmother that weekend, had either seen me collapse or found me in a pile on the floor. He managed to get me back on my bed that I had fallen next to or at the foot of. Carolyn was checking my blood pressure and heart rate – which, according to clinical standards put me in the category of being dead, which is what I probably would have been if Chris hadn't found me and called for Carolyn. Carolyn started putting glucose under my tongue to get my blood sugar up.

Chris called the local EMT's who arrived within minutes along with a medic shortly thereafter. Once they assessed the situation and got me stabilized, they moved me to a gurney, out the door and into the waiting ambulance. A short, but rapid trip (maybe five minutes) with the lights flashing and siren wailing and I was being rolled into the Emergency Room of the local, small, West Virginia University-affiliated hospital. (Continue reading the rest of the article on the blog.)

GREETINGS OF THE SEASON and Some Other IMPORTANT INFORMATION

Thanks for visiting my blog page and . . . today is Day #113 of my adventure . . . 

Greetings of the Season!

Merry Christmas, if that is how you celebrate this season.

And greetings to you if you celebrate this holiday time of the year in some other meaningful way.

And, I also want to wish you a Happy, Healthy and Abundant 2020. I hope the new year fulfills all your expectations.

Now, I'm going to let you all in on something I've kept pretty much undercover for the past four months. Only a very few folks know about what I'm going to reveal.

As you have probably noticed, I have been pretty quiet during this period. I have not been traveling as I normally would be. I have not been posting on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, PM or email. I did actively post on my blog, but that was about it.

I have not made this information public because, frankly, there are so many other individuals I know who have been experiencing their own challenges, especially medical challenges. However, in less than two weeks I'll be undergoing something that I feel extremely confident I'll pull through without any question in my mind. Unfortunately, it is very serious and, as we all know, there are no guarantees in life.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Better and Better – November 22, 2019 – Day 83

I believe it is in my nature to dance by virtue of the beat of my heart, the pulse of my blood and the music in my mind. - Robert Fulghum

It is now Day #83. My thought to ponder today is from one of my favorite authors, Robert Fulghum. There is some powerful vision in his words. I believe this is or should be true for everyone. Unfortunately, I believe most people get lost in the stress, complexity and trivia of day to day life in our 21^st Century society.

Yes! I said I was going to write a day by day journal of my “adventure.” But, you know the old saying, “the best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” Those words were penned by Robert Burns. Here is the reality. At this stage of my adventure, there are often days that go by and nothing of consequence or interest occurs. It is actually quite tiring for me to have to think up something to say. So, am I really saying anything of value or just using up words?

So, here are some things of note. Nothing much on Days 72 & 73. On Day 74, November 13^th, I had three medical appointments.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Yikes! My Own Words – November 10, 2019 – Day 71

“People have lost their dreams years, even decades, ago. They have lost their own individuality. They mainly identify with spouses, partners, family, jobs, social involvements. But, they have sublimated their own dreams so much they can no longer remember what they were.” - Ed Helvey

You read that right, that's a quote from me. Here it is, Day 71, Sunday November 10^th (the day before Veterans Day) and I received an email from one of my long-time followers of this blog, Richard Rosen in Florida. Wow! As I read my own words, they seemed to be particularly meaningful today. No! Not because I wrote them, but because, as I deal with my cancer adventure, I need them to bolster myself up.

So, today, I start off with my own quote. Below, I'm going to list a number of other quotes from other “dreamers.” The intent? Simple! To inspire and encourage you to reach for those dreams that have been gathering dust in the far reaches of your memory.

But, first, here is a brief update on the past few days, Day 69, Friday and Day 70, Saturday as well as today. Eating and drinking, while still a bit challenging, has been pretty good and I've been enjoying the flavors and textures of the various foods and liquids I've indulged in over the past three days. I even had pepperoni pizza last night and polished off the cold leftovers today. I've been enjoying orange and grapefruit juice, two of the many juices I like.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – What a Difference a Day or Two Make – November 7, 2019 – Day 66

I learned to take those experiences that were difficult in my life and in the adversity that I had overcome to use it for a positive change. - Dominique Moceanu

So, today is Day 68 of this “adventure.” It was actually a very good day. Yesterday, Wednesday and Day 67 was a good day, too, but today was better. There seems to be a trend going on here.

Meet my buddy, Bella. I'm not a cat person, but Bella has adopted me. She is cross between a feline and a canine. That is, she is a cat, but she has certain attributes we normally associate with dogs. She will come in, play “high 5” with me, very gently reach up and touch my face, nuzzle me to pet her and then she'll curl up and make herself at home as you see her in this photo. She can be feisty with other cats and is generally a loner. But, she does bring me some comfort.

Now, let's get back to the “adventure.” Eating improved slightly yesterday along with drinking. I still dealt with the massive fatigue and low energy problem. I had about my typical 4 hours of low energy productivity throughout the day with lots of resting and napping. But, I actually accomplished a few things.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Things Are Improving – November 5, 2019 – Day 66

Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Today is Day 66, Tuesday. Time just seems to be passing, but as Emerson suggests patience is the key here. So, four days have passed since my last article. But, there has been some positive change occurring.

Day 63, Saturday, was basically another day like the other days of the preceding week. Massive fatigue, no energy and still no ability to swallow food or liquids. I was continuing to lose weight. I attempted to be a little productive, but I don't feel like I was. However, even though I'm dealing with some “brain fog,” probably caused, at least partially, by not getting enough protein or carbs, I did come to the realization that I had to find a way to stop this downward slide.

So, Day 64, Sunday, I reviewed the comprehensive printed information I was given and the in-depth conversation I had with the Cancer Center nutritionist. I decided to make a shopping list of foods that would work with the exact circumstance I found myself in. It was a long list and even included a couple things that might be considered “junk food,” but they were highly caloric and I need calories.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Where Has Time Gone? – November 1, 2019 – Day 62

I am grateful for all the moments that I have, and I'm moving forward one step at a time to the future. - Park Bo-gum

Seven days have passed since my last article post here on the blog. Several people have wondered what happened to me. I'm here. But, at the same time, I have the feeling I'm not here.

Exactly a week ago today I had my last radiation and my last chemotherapy treatment. I had a wonderful feeling of accomplishment. I managed to get through approximately two months having my innards burned and having toxic fluids forced through my veins to attack a mass that had invaded my body and had the potential of ending my life prematurely. Now, to be honest, that possibility still exists. However, to this date, I have not received any indication that I have a “death sentence in the near future. I remain on my 46-year plan.

That being said, both my radiation and my chemotherapy doctors, who I met with the Wednesday before my last treatments, warned me that this period of recovery right after treatments ended, could be worse than anything I had experienced until then. As much as I hate to admit it, their prediction was accurate. So, here is a capsule of what has transpired since last Friday.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – IT IS DONE! – October 25, 2019 – Day 55

Inspiration comes from within yourself. One has to be positive. When you're positive, good things happen. - Deep Roy

Today I was there on time and ready for my LAST radiation treatment and my LAST chemotherapy treatment. Both were routine. When I completed my radiation treatment I was presented with a Graduation Certificate – nice touch.

I moved all my stuff to Carolyn's car and we drove back to her place in West Virginia. I bid Judy goodbye this morning before she had to leave for a day-long commitment she had. I thanked her for all she has done to make this experience so much easier for both, Carolyn and me, by not having to drive about 140 miles round trip over the 7 mountains and 7 valleys five days a week. My McVansion is still parked in front of Judy's house and she leaves on Sunday to travel to Alabama to spend some time with her dying sister.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – ONE More Day – October 24, 2019 – Day 54

The most important thing is to try and inspire people so that they can be great in whatever they want to do. - Kobe Bryant

ONE MORE DAY!
ONE MORE DAY!

ONE MORE DAY!

I can't wait for tomorrow afternoon when I'll be through with radiation and chemotherapy.

Not much to report! I finally found a deal on a new Lenovo ThinkPad T470 laptop computer and made the deal today. It's being assembled at the factory and should reach me by next Tuesday or Wednesday. It's time to retire my very reliable but very slow running and tired Lenovo ThinkPad T420s. I'll likely put a small SSD drive in it, reinitiate it and keep it as a backup.

Live free and be happy. EH

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Two More Days – October 23, 2019 – Day 53

In order to carry a positive action we must develop here a positive vision. - Dalai Lama

Just TWO MORE DAYS of radiation and one more of chemotherapy. If you've ever been through this regimen of treatment, you know just how significant those three words are.

This will, again, be a short post. It was actually a very positive, no, make that a very, extremely positive day today. In addition to having my radiation treatment, they also did my lab work today, a day earlier than normal. They did the lab work because I had two doctors' appointments today. One was with my radiation doctor. The second one was with my medical oncologist (chemotherapy). They wanted the lab work for the second appointment.

I'll be honest, I'm totally wiped out and have been since I arrived back at Judy's about 12:15 PM today. So, I'll save all the details of the two appointments for another day when I have some energy to think and write. However, I will say this much. Both doctors effectively gave me A++++ reports. I walked out today feeling very positive.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Three More Days – October 22, 2019 – Day 52

Trust in dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity. - Khalil Gibran

Today the post is really short. THREE MORE DAYS!

That's about it. I started to let more of the outside world know about what's happened to me. I'm finally comfortable doing that as I wind down this really fatiguing protocol of radiation and chemotherapy.

I'm amazed I can still drive myself over to the cancer center and back to Judy's. Home plate is in sight and I'm preparing to slide in on Friday. Not much more to report today other than I actually got a few things accomplished. Hooray.

Live free and be happy. EH

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Four More Days – October 21, 2019 – Day 51

Virtually nothing is impossible in this world if you just put your mind to it and maintain a positive attitude. - Lou Holtz

Four more days to go. All I'm focused on now is counting these days down until Friday, October 25^th when I will have my last radiation treatment and my last chemo treatment. Just four more days.

I'll be honest. I was not looking forward to driving over the 7 mountains and through the 7 valleys again this morning to arrive in Winchester at the cancer center for my 10:15 radiation appointment. And, I didn't enjoy it. But, thankfully, Carolyn has been maintaining a very positive and supportive attitude.

We actually arrived about 20 minutes early for my appointment – and a very positive thing happened. The radiation techs, Colleen and Allison (Michelle wasn't there this morning) called me in for my treatment 15 minutes early. So, instead of going in at 10:15, I actually was done and walking out the door at 10:15.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Another Nothing Day – October 20, 2019 – Day 50

You can do everything you can to try to stop bad things from happening to you, but eventually things will happen, so the best prevention is a positive attitude. - Marie Osmond

I found that today, Day #50, was almost a carbon copy of yesterday. No energy and no real motivation.

That being said, I actually did get a few simple things done and some research done as well. While I continue to work on keeping my attitude positive, I'm finding it somewhat demoralizing to realize there is so much I want to do and I have the resources at my fingertips to do it, but I just can't muster the motivation.

I'm also facing the fact that tomorrow morning I have that long (and it seems to get longer every week) drive over the 7 mountains and through the 7 valleys back to Winchester to be there in time for my 10:15 AM radiation treatment. That's a reality. But, another reality is that at 10:30 AM tomorrow morning I'll only have four more treatments left.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – A Nothing Day – October 19, 2019 – Day 49

If you have a positive attitude and constantly strive to give your best effort, eventually you will overcome your immediate problems and find you are ready for greater challenges. - Pat Riley

This is going to be very short today. I was wiped out.

I have a long “To-Do List” and, to be completely honest, the most productive thing I could do today was finding a positive quote for this article. I did a little reading. I did some research on the Web. I managed to walk outside to get some warm rays of the sun on my face. Oh yeah, and I made myself some breakfast.

I've said this before, I have the energy of a wet dishrag. Or, maybe a better way to put it is that I feel like I just finished round 12 of a seemingly endless prizefight and I can't throw in the towel.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Fatigued Revisited – October 18, 2019 – Day 48

Fatigue is the best pillow. - Benjamin Franklin

     

One more week to go! Five more days of radiation and one more day of chemo. Next Friday, October 25^th, I slide into home plate with this course of my cancer treatment. Today was a good day. But, it seemed very long and I was not feeling as much stamina and energy as I did yesterday and the day before. I still had about 7 ½ hours of sleep. But, it just wasn't the same.

I'm thinking that thinking about going through the radiation and then the chemo and then the hour and a half drive through the 7 mountains and 7 valleys played with my mind. But, the good thing is that I got through it. Like I do every day, as soon as I approach the door of the cancer center I straighten up, put on my positive happy face and greet everyone with a big smile and positive comment. It works like a charm every time.

I missed seeing Karen today, one of the two women who greet me at the radiation center reception desk. She must have had the day off. But, Julia gave me a big smile and friendly welcome. Everything went as routine, in at 10:15 and out at 10:30. Then I checked in 10 minutes early at the reception desk across the lobby where I go for my chemo treatments. And, received more smiles. And, as soon as Rebecca, inside the chemo treatment received the message I was there and ready, she came out looking for me. So, I went in a bit earlier than my appointment.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – The To Do List – October 17, 2019 – Day 47

The older you get, the things that you thought you wanted to do when you were younger, you're checking them off your list because you no longer want to them. - Cal Ripken, Jr.

The first thing on my To-Do List today was radiation treatment #22. Only 6 more treatments to go. Hooray! Home plate is looking closer. My second thing on the list today was to get my lab work done across the lobby in the chemotherapy treatment room. But . . .

I was sidetracked by a woman who, as I was sitting in the waiting area for my radiation treatment, walked up and said: “Is Edward here?” She had me. She is Althea and Althea is an oncology nutritionist/dietician. Her job is to keep those going through all the various medical cancer treatments healthy and hearty. And, yes, that does smack of being an oxymoron. And, if you read yesterday's article, you'll remember that both the surgical oncologist I met with yesterday and my radiation doctor and nurse said they were going to connect me with Althea.

So, Althea chatted about my food intake. What I was ingesting. When I was eating. How often I was eating. How much I was eating and similar topics. She was taking copious notes. Then I heard another call. It was the familiar “Mr. Helvey.” That was Colleen, one of my regular radiation technicians calling me in to be “beamed up for my 22^nd time. So, off I trotted into the beam up chamber.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Seven To Go – October 16, 2019 – Day 46

I believe it is in my nature to dance by virtue of the beat of my heart, the pulse of my blood and the music in my mind. - Robert Fulghum

Today's quote is by one of my favorite authors. I enjoy Fulghum's books of essays. I learn something from him and I'm inspired. And, yes! I only have seven more radiation treatments to go – I really can almost feel “sliding into home plate.” But, as I told my radiation doctor and the surgical oncologist doctor today, I feel like I've just completed the 12^th round of a prizefight. The fatigue is overwhelming.

Now, that being said, today was not as bad as the last several days. Am I fatigued? I most certainly am. But, I actually felt better today, ate a bit better today and was even more productive today. That's all good stuff. My radiation doctor said I'm doing very well compared to a lot of other patients, especially considering that I'm also taking a full course of chemo at the same time. This is good news.

I also met with the surgical oncologist today. Dr. Wagner is the doctor who was on ER duty when I was in the ER Observation unit from August 21^st to August 23^rd. He is the doctor who laid the news on me about the results of my endoscopy and CT Scan. He also was the doctor who got me connected with Dr. Gemma, my medical oncologist responsible for my chemotherapy. As you may recall, Dr. Gemma was my first and only choice for this part of my treatment.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – ZZZZZZZZZ – October 15, 2019 – Day 45

Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time. - John Lubbock

Day 45 is almost over. The Z's in the title of this article represents what I spent most of today doing. Yep! I spent it sleeping. I mentioned at the beginning of this series of articles there were going to be days when not much of anything was going to be happening. Well, today was one of them.

I woke up. I read a little. I answered some emails. I finally got up and had some light conversation with my friend, Judy. I drove the van over to the cancer center and had my daily radiation treatment at the appointed time of 10:15 AM (actually they called me in a few minutes early and I left a few minutes early).

I made my way over to Costco because I just felt like one of their “Very Berry” frozen yogurt sundaes. I enjoyed eating it in the van parked under a tree and listening to a classic radio detective show on my satellite radio. Then I made my way back over to Judy's, said 'hi' to her when I got back. Then it was up to my room. It was around noon time. I laid down on my bed and the fatigue washed over me. It didn't take long for the ZZZZZZs to take over.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – If It's Monday, It's #19 – October 14, 2019 – Day 44

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way. - Viktor E. Frankl

Today was another of those days where Carolyn drove me over the 7 mountains and through the 7 valleys back to Winchester and the Cancer Center. Today is Monday and the day I had my 19^th radiation treatment.

If you read yesterday's long post that covered yesterday and the previous five days, you know that last week was quite a week for me. I'll be honest. The fatigue factor is pretty much, at least to date, the only major side effect I'm experiencing from this protocol of radiation five days a week and chemotherapy once a week. But, when I say I'm experiencing fatigue, I mean I AM EXPERIENCING FATIGUE.

I had a good night of sleep last night. But, again, being honest. I really was not looking forward to the drive to Winchester. I had little appetite last night and that carried through until this morning. I know I MUST eat and maintain my weight and I must hydrate constantly. But, between the fatigue and, what I'll call, the mild dread (although it's really not as bad as I'm making it sound) of another treatment, it's hard to maintain my attitude and my motivation.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – The Week That Was – October 8 - 13, 2019 – Days 38-43

The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

So, it's Day #43 of my “adventure.” What happened to days 38, 39, 40, 41 and 42? Gone! They are gone in a flash, or so it would seem. So, before I run out of steam today. I'm going to attempt to bring you up to speed. I indicated at the beginning of this series of articles that I would try to write every day. Unfortunately, I hit a bump in the road. So, take a deep breath because time is going to fly in this post covering six days.

Day #38 (Tuesday)

It started like most of my days since this adventure began. I was at my friend Judy's house, I went for my 10:15 radiation treatment and was out by 10:30. After that, I went across the lobby of the Cancer Center to have my weekly laboratory blood drawn and I was done for the day.

My good friend and Air Force buddy, Dave aka Mickey Bo, who I wrote about before on Day #18 and left this link to his Internet Rock & Roll show, MickeyBo's Rock 'n' Roll Revue, drove up for another visit. We chatted for a while with my friend Judy (who Dave also knows) and then decided to patronize a very nice Thai restaurant that is well established in Winchester. We had a pleasant lunch, enjoyed the food, the service and more chat time.