Benefits or Entitlements

Benefits and entitlements, are they one and the same or are they different breeds of animals? There seems to be a trend for those in the bureaucracy of federal (and even state) government toward calling anything they pay out to citizens as entitlements. Now, I'm not sure. Is it because I'm becoming a crotchety old man (NOT)? Or, is it because those in the elected offices, their high ranking appointees and the massive legion of high level bureaucrats are using governmentspeak or doublespeak to get us to believe something that isn't true.

Would this be the first time the government has attempted (and often succeeded) in duping the "flock?" I think not. That is a huge topic for another time. However, as humans, we are basically pack animals. Although, it's probably more accurate to say we're like flock or herd animals. Watch cattle in the pasture sometime. When it's milking time they all line up one behind the other and follow the leader right into the milk barn. A new word becomes the "in" word to use in the pop culture - cool, dude, awesome, right on, righteous, bro, etc. All of a sudden, it slips into our vocabulary and pretty soon we're all using it. . . READ MORE

A Warning For Everyone - No One Is Immune From This

You may have heard about this, but here is a feature article from the Washington Post, a reasonably well respected newspaper regardless of anyone's political persuasions. The article is about the Washington Metro Police Department - supposedly, one would think, in our nation's capital, a pillar of virtue. Not so! Read the story but, especially watch the video the Post produced.

It doesn't appear to matter what your race is or reason for being anywhere. I get the impression police are being trained to profile any vehicle they believe will contain a sizable amount of cash regardless of whether the vehicle is a "beater" or a luxury vehicle or anything between.

By the way, this has mostly been used by counties, small towns and villages, but as the big cities are realizing how much this "highway robbery" can bring in to be used to fund their departments, it appears they are raising the bar.

Read the Post article here and view the video:  http://wapo.st/1H6xAtO

Obviously, it's still a relatively small fraction of the traveling public who end up being targeted. But, the number is growing and so is the number of consulting/training companies who earn millions by teaching police how to "highway rob" with intimidation. They use interdiction methods specifically designed to catch smugglers and drug traffickers. But, the vast majority of the victims of these interdictions are innocent people like you and me. 

Just one more thing to be aware of. I guess we have to all make sure we don't carry any large sums of cash with us anywhere. You never know when you may become the next target or where it may happen. But usually, it will be at some serious distance from your home base. 

Here is something interesting. This is a current definition of "Police State" from the Urban Dictionary:

"A country where the police watch what you do and try to control your life. Where there's cameras in town centres and on public transport. Where you can be arrested because of something you said to a friend about the leaders of your country. Where police stop and search people for no reason. [my comment - anyone hear of "Stop and Frisk?"] Where you can be detained without charge or trial. Where the state plants bugs with impunity. Where protesters have to get police permits, and where police regularly attack protesters." 

And here is what is stated by Wikipedia in the opening paragraph of the topic "Police State:"

Police state is a term that originally designated a state regulated by a civil administration, but since the middle of the 20th Century, the term has "taken on the emotional and derogatory meaning of a government that exercises power arbitrarily through the police."

Does any of this sound familiar? 

The Top 15 List of Life Thieves: Introduction

Are you being robbed?

Did you know there are thousands of thieves stealing your life from you everyday?

It's true! But, the worst part is that most of us don't realize it until we're at the other end of our life. At some point, we all begin taking stock and reviewing our memories and recalling all the things we never got to do. Why? Because something always seemed to come along that diverted us from the things we really wanted to do.

This Life Thief concept struck me like a lightning bolt the other morning when I was waking up. I realized there were so many things I haven't done in my life that I had really wanted to do. I also began thinking about friends, family and others I know who have experienced or are currently experiencing some thief stealing parts of their lives. . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #169 – Alert: Don't Waste Your Time! Antique Wireless Museum, Bloomfield, New York, July 6, 2014

I don't usually use pictures of places like this as Photos-of-the-Week, but for the Antique Wireless Museum, I'm making an exception. This place REALLY ticked me off. I discovered the place on my way through New York State to a new location. I checked it out and found out it was not open the day I was passing through the area. That annoyed me, but didn't really make me angry. There was a similar museum in Connecticut near Bradley International Airport that wasn't open very many hours, either. Basically, the place pictured above was only open for a couple hours on Tuesdays and for three hours each on Saturdays and Sundays. Now, THAT is NOT convenient for the public. It should have been my first hint. . . READ MORE

Purpose and Passion

I've mentioned these two motivators a number of times before. But, the other day, while working on the details of the upcoming Veteran Speakers Retreat that I've coordinated for the past twelve years and this being my last year, something struck me about these two words and what they represent. So, some thoughts have been mulling around in my head and here they are.

Living free is both a philosophy of living and a lifestyle. But, some people get the wrong idea about living free. Some people think it means living for free, as in not being productive and living off someone else. Others think that it means being homeless, dumpster diving and scrounging for food, wearing used clothes and sleeping on park benches or in hobo villages. Still others may think it involves some kind of criminal enterprise such as being a con artist, Ponzi scheme operator or even a pickpocket. In reality, living free means none of these things.

Living free simply means that one has opened his or her mind (remember the mind is like that parachute, it only works when it's open) to possibilities for a lifestyle that is other than what is considered in contemporary society as traditional or mainstream. The living free philosophy has nothing to do with dictating where someone lives, what kind of housing or shelter someone chooses to live in, how they choose to dress (fashion/style) and acquire their apparel, what kind of diet they choose and enjoy and, perhaps, one of the most important facets of living free is how someone generates the resources (earn a living, if you will) to support whatever their chosen lifestyle is.

The Pre-conditioned Mainstream

Everyone comes from somewhere. Now, isn't that a profound thought? But, it's necessary to make that statement to understand why and how most people make the choices and decisions that determine how they will ultimately life their lives. The range is pretty wide when you think about it. Let's not consider individuals whose origins are from a society in other countries on other continents and possibly even underdeveloped or primitive tribal societies (and yes, there are still primitive tribal societies in the 21st Century).

As societies go, the United States is very young. It's only 237 years old if you use the Declaration of Independence in 1776 as the beginning of the U.S. Actually, the real beginning of the U.S. officially began operating as the United States of America under the oldest operating constitutional government in the world on March 4, 1789. So, in reality, the U.S. is only 224 years old. However, European colonization began as early as 1492 for the Spanish and 1497 for the British with the landing of John Cabot. So, those earlier ventures to North America extend the beginnings of what ultimately became modern society in the U.S. to about 516 years ago. Of course, the Norse Vikings reached parts of northeastern Canada as early as 1000. We'll not include that period for my purposes in this article. And for practicality, we'll just say that the foundation for the U.S. society began in the 1700's along with the beginning of the Industrial Revolution.

Now, why is this significant? Very simply it's because Western Europe countries are considered by most historians to be the most advanced, civilized societies of the time. For some reason, most of the earlier advanced societies in the Middle East and northern Africa as well as Asian societies like China and Japan, didn't keep up with the advances in Western Europe. I was in awe when I walked across the Charles Bridge (originally called The Stone Bridge) in Prague, Czech Republic and realized it was built between 1357 and the early 1400's (before "Columbus sailed the ocean blue") and it replaced a bridge that had been built between 1158 and 1172. The only structures we have in the U.S. that truly date back that long or longer are the Pueblo Villages in New Mexico. They date back 1,000 or more years. But, these were not considered an advanced or developed society. So, that brings us back to our migrating ancestors from Western Europe and the British Isles, of course.

I make this distinction because this was the basis for how our advanced society developed in the U.S. Since the U.S. was basically a frontier, the pioneers had the opportunity to begin the society with the contemporary lifestyle of the western European countries and the British Empire. Additionally, the U.S. was in its birthing stage as the Industrial Revolution was dramatically changing all of society forever. Although most early U.S. cities were modeled after western European cities, most of the western European cities were terribly antiquated and simply continued to function as they had for hundreds to even a thousand years or more. Even today, when you visit "so-called" modern Europe, most of the cities are centered on the antique buildings, streets and infrastructure. Newer, more modern forms of architecture exist in the outer suburbs and as replacements for the portions of major cities destroyed by the modern warfare of the 20th Century.  

The Industrial Revolution Alters Lifestyle 

The Industrial Revolution began around the mid 1700's in England and spread rapidly through Western Europe and the emerging society that would become the United States in the later 18th Century. I won't go into details of the changes brought about by the Industrial Revolution; you can study that yourself if you're interested. But, the Industrial Revolution is pretty much the catalyst for what we consider our modern, mainstream, traditional lifestyle. The reason, in my opinion, that the U.S. became the world leader in industrialization and eventually, the Information Age, is because the U.S. didn't have to restructure and rebuild the old societies, cities, manufacturing processes and mindsets of a population steeped in antiquity. The people who migrated to the U.S. were pioneers. They were a hearty stock who wanted to build a new life and ultimately a new society and nation. Individually, they all came seeking some kind of freedom and they were willing to do whatever it took to accomplish that goal. A huge number died in that process, but the passion for freedom and autonomy won out. They had a purpose and the passion to fulfill that purpose. 

Unfortunately, over the next couple centuries human nature played both it's positive and good cards and it's negative and evil cards. Greed and corruption, two fairly dominant human traits played out. The middle class was carved out. The unions were formed. Public schools became the standard. Each of these influenced what has become the mainstream, traditional American lifestyle. Unfortunately, in my opinion, all of this has led to the demise of what was originally termed the "American Dream." The dream went from seeking freedom and opportunity to do and be anything and anyone you wanted to become to seeking security and measuring success by the amount of money and unnecessary stuff a person could accumulate (while also accumulating huge debts in the process) thus, relinquishing the personal freedom and many kinds of opportunities.

The "American Dream" was born out of the Declaration of Independence. However, as we all know, at that time we were not all "created equal." There was a large population of slaves (mostly black, but some white) who had no opportunity. Women had minimal property rights until the 20th Century. They also didn't have the right to vote or hold public office. They were primarily relegated to housekeeping and childcare work.

So, the, so-called, American Dream at the nation's birth wasn't equally shared and enjoyed by all members of the emerging new society. Many things have driven change in this country and the American Dream has changed and evolved right along. But, for those (primarily white men and especially those who were born into some position of influence) who chased that elusive dream, there were wonderful opportunities and fulfillment.

Certainly, while things are still not completely equal, there are many Black, Asian, Hispanic and those folks from other origins as well as women, who through purpose and passion have moved up the ladder and made significant achievements.

The Changed American Dream

But, as all of this has happened, the American Dream has changed as well. Many consider the American Dream to be dead or virtually impossible to realize any longer. That's probably because the fulfillment of the Dream is now equated with living in larger and larger, more costly housing and accumulating more and more stuff. In order to acquire all these trappings of, so-called, American Dream success, credit has been expanded. Most homes are mortgaged to the hilt. Cars are now either leased or have financing as long as six years. Plastic money (credit cards) has expanded, as has the accompanying debt, to astronomical levels. And advanced education costs so much as to leave many young people in huge amounts of debt as they start life out. Unfortunately, it appears that the original American Dream has been corrupted to being buried in debt by the accumulation of stuff. Those in poverty now can often actually live as well, and in some cases better, by living off the public dole financed by the, so-called, productive members of society, only numbering about 50% of the population. The old saying, "the rich get richer while the poor get poorer," seems to be fulfilled. We see a huge and growing gap between a, generally, very greedy wealthy class, a collapsing middle class and enlarging poverty class.

I was fortunate (or maybe not so, in some ways) to have earned two college degrees at a time when it was still affordable and I didn't have to face a life of unforgivable debt. But, I still remember many of the successful people of that time didn't have college degrees. A college education wasn't an absolute necessity for success. It could open some opportunities. There are many examples of college grads that ended up working for those who didn't hold college degrees. My father was one of those examples. He never earned any degrees, but parlayed a couple night school drafting classes into becoming an in demand non-degreed electrical/mechanical design engineer in the emerging aerospace industry with degreed engineers under his supervision.

Contemporary examples include the late Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Michael Dell and Mark Zuckerberg, among others, who are indisputably four of the most successful men in the world and don't have college degrees. And, don't forget Henry Ford, Thomas Edison and Walt Disney (a high school dropout). The point here, again, is that they grabbed the literal meaning of the original American Dream. The trait and motivation they and so many others like them had was a defined purpose and the passion to achieve their dreams. This is true in all fields of endeavor.

A Welfare Society? Some Work To Support Those Who Don't!

Now, it is not and never has been my position to pass judgment on anyone. People are people. Some of us will achieve great accomplishments, realize great success and probably accumulate great wealth of some kind in the process. Others, will become the "worker bees," a term I never liked and still don't, but as in a beehive, these are the members of society who do all the day to day tasks of keeping the society (hive) functional and, in general, healthy. And then there are the less fortunate people. Some of them are just plain "bottom feeders." They contribute little, if anything, to the society and live off the productive members. There are also those who weren't dealt a very good hand in life. They may have physical and/or mental limitations. There are also those who have fallen from a better position in life to a lower or bottom rung for a variety of reasons. Some of the circumstances were of their own invention while other circumstances were just destiny.

The amazing thing is that there are many examples of people who grew up in abject poverty and despair through the circumstances of their birth, yet, they went on to carve out the stepping stones to a successful life. They discovered their talents. They may have been blessed with great athletic abilities or artistic or musical abilities. They may have had a superior intellectual ability and were able to impress the right people, thus, opening doors and opportunities for themselves. Skin color, ethnicity and gender didn't stand in their way. They found a purpose in their lives and they grew a burning passion to win that Olympic Gold Medal or work their way up through the military ranks to become a high level officer or kept inventing things until one of them captured the attention of the right people or wrote and/or performed music at every opportunity until someone who could open doors finally heard the person. There was no magic. There was no real secret. It simply took a defined purpose and then a burning passion to achieve and live the life the individual wanted.

I won't discuss the bottom feeders or those who use their abilities to go into criminal enterprises that create pain and harm others to their own advantage. They are, unfortunately, ever present. But, also fortunately, the worst of them seem to be a very tiny percentage of the population of most societies. There are, also, those who are conditioned by their parents (if they even know who they are) or other influences to beat the system. When you teach someone how to fish or hunt or grow food, they can eat for a lifetime. When you simply give them handouts, they learn to stand there and wait for the next handout. Their purpose in life becomes to be the best at doing nothing productive and expecting handouts. Their passion becomes to manipulate the system so they live the best they can while doing nothing productive in return. In the animal kingdom we would call this leeching off a host.

Rewarding Non-productivity

Unfortunately, when you reward this behavior by making it easier and easier to be on the dole, as it appears has happened in western Europe, England and the U.S., this segment of society grows and lives off the segment of society that will eventually diminishes in size as they realize they are being fleeced. In the U.S., current estimates are that 15% of the population receives SNAP (food stamp) benefits each month. This doesn't include the myriad of other local, state and federal programs that support those unable or unwilling to support themselves.

Now, believe me, I'm not a person who wants to see any of our children or even our adults who are disadvantaged for a period of time be undernourished or starve. However, where there is no "payment" in return in the form of doing something productive for the community, state or country, where is the incentive to have any purpose or passion to achieve on your own?

Channeling Purpose and Productivity

So, not to belabor an issue that's a political hot potato, I have to wonder what we can do in this country to inspire and motivate people to want to find a real purpose in their life and to light a burning passion to go after that purpose. In my case, I've been an entrepreneur all my life. I've created several businesses and along with those businesses I created jobs and work for other people either as employees, contractors or suppliers. I've realized some of the rewards of being a productive member of society. And, I've reached a point after doing this for over 50 years where I decided to reevaluate my lifestyle, my needs, my wants, my purposes and my passions. Some consider me retired, but I don't recognize that word in my vocabulary. Others may think I'm living off the taxpayers because I draw my Social Security benefit - which I involuntarily had to contribute into for over 50 years along with my Medicare coverage that I contributed to for 48 years. I might add that I cannot live off the stipend I receive from Social Security in today's economy and I have to pay for portions of my medical care just as I had to before Medicare and I had regular health insurance.

But more than that, I NEED purpose in my life. I need a reason to get up each morning and plant my feet on the ground and get up and get moving. I also NEED something to be passionate about. Oh, sure, I could be like the extreme political liberals or conservatives and run around ranting and raving about something I can't change like what's right or wrong with our government (and please, don't tempt me). But, as I didn't stand in "peace vigils" with Student Peace Union during the Vietnam War era, because I was busy working on productive things that actually could make a difference, I don't waste my time on politics because there is no percentage in it.

So, here I am, 68 years young and I still have some unfulfilled purposes in my life. Hooray! I have some burning passions that need to be fanned. Yes! While they are entrepreneurial in nature, they are socially entrepreneurial. This means that while they have some basis in a business structure, the ultimate purpose, other than supplementing my small Social Security monthly stipend, is to further some things I'm passionate about. And, of course, these purposes and passions encompass my "living free" lifestyle and my yearning to freely wander as a location independent individual to explore and learn about this country and the world, to experience things I've yet to have the pleasure, experience or adventure of and to meet as many interesting and fascinating people representing Americana as I can. You'll learn more about these purposes and passions of mine in the near future and I'll be looking for input and, in some cases, assistance as I pursue them.     

Predictable

What is predictable? People!

You can pretty much count on the predictability of people like you can count on the fact that it will be 12 noon everyday at the same time in whatever time zone you lives. So, what's wrong with being predictable? Actually, in most cases, nothing. We can predict when the sun will rise and fall, the tides will come in and go out, when there will be a new moon, when the seasons will change and how the vast majority of people will live and react to specific situations.

Based on the premise that we can predict how the majority of people will live and react to specific situations, anyone who doesn't fit this pattern is an enigma. It's easy to understand why individuals who "choose" not to adhere to these predictable patterns are considered "non-conformists," "outsiders," and "mavericks." But, are we really all that different?

Well, based on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs pyramid, no, we're not. Here is a simple representation of Maslow's pyramid:

 Certainly, at the base of the pyramid all our physiological needs are pretty much the same. But, by the time we move up to the second step of the pyramid there are significant differences that start becoming noticeable. The third step, while it seems that we might all be pretty similar, harbors even more differences. The fourth step opens up more opportunities for differences. And, in my opinion, probably a majority of people never achieve the step of true self-actualization.

Two Fringe Groups

There is the general population in cultures and societies that aligns very closely with the Hierarchy Pyramid. Then, as I see it. there are two fringe groups.

One of the fringe groups is composed of folks I like to refer to as Living Free. It's a very minute percentage of the total population. This living free concept is, of course, the basis for this blog. The unique characteristic about this living free group is that, for the most part, they are non-conformists and mavericks. The only credo is living free and choosing to live differently than the vast majority of the population. Some individuals in the group live this way due to a variety of  unfortunate circumstances. However, like the early hunting and gathering bands, they seek the basics of life and carve out a niche for themselves.

Others in this group are in a position where they could easily choose to live the stereotypical and predominant lifestyle of their culture or society. Perhaps they have already been there and have chosen to abandon that lifestyle for one of personal freedom.

Allow me to make some disclaimers. Some of what I'm saying is broad generalizations. Some of it may be exaggerated for impact. There is no one-size fits all. But, I'm far from a radical political thinker. And, let's not kid ourselves. There is no such thing as total freedom in this world. In some manner we all are influenced and have to bow to "The Man."

However, in a world that has become so complex, expensive, time consuming or, maybe it's better to say, all consuming, this group of individuals choose small, compact, simple and economical lifestyles. Some are embracing a small, but growing movement toward "Tiny Houses." Others are living in rural locations in small cabins or refurbished travel trailers. Still others may have chosen to give up the sticks and bricks homes in the city or suburbs in favor of a nomadic life, like a turtle, with their house on their backs, living full-time in various forms of recreational vehicles, vans or even cars. There are even a few who pack a tent and travel by motorcycle or even walk.

This group of living free, non-conformists, while often envied by the masses who stay in "The System," are probably the least understood. I dare say, this group of people may also be the most content, fulfilled and happiest in the ways that matter most.

The other fringe group is the "Power Class." These are the people who, consciously or sub-consciously, claw, kick and bite their way to the top of the various societal structures purely for the heady feeling of power and/or to achieve great wealth, regardless of the cost. Of course, none of them will ever admit that openly. They want everyone to believe that they are there to "serve" you and me and the "working class." But, don't let that fool you. They are narcissistic power and greed driven, easily corruptible individuals who will use anyone and any means to achieve their own ends. You know who they are. They run our governments, major government agencies, the military, the financial system, the major industrial complex and so on.

Of course, to be fair, there are a few people who are not power hungry, greedy, corruptible narcissists who manage to make it into some of these lofty positions. But, it's interesting how, unfortunately, sooner or later, they seem to fall into the pattern. One recent example is Lance Armstrong. Once a hero, role model and the image of overcoming challenges like his cancer. Today, an admitted cheater, liar, fraud and abuser of anyone who got in his way.

Listen to the President(s), listen to the outgoing Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton when being questioned about her failings and those she led and her leader said of the four Americans murdered in Libya, "Was it because of a protest or was it because of guys out for a walk one night who decided they'd go kill some Americans? What difference at this point does it make?" That's pure arrogance from someone supposedly charged with the responsibility for the safety and security of her charges and representing her country, its integrity and its people.

Back to the Predictable - Greece and Spain

So, what does all this have to do with predictability? In a word, everything.

Why am I bringing up Greece and Spain? It's simple, really. People are predictable because they will react in similar fashions in similar situations. Much of Europe has been extremely liberal in government employment. The governments are over employed (too many people to do the job), provide large amounts of vacation, personal time, sick time and other time off, cushy benefits including, universal healthcare, early retirements and large pensions. Additionally, they have required this same thing from private sector jobs, usually through unions.

But, someone has to pay for all this. Their tax structures and revenues didn't bring in enough to cover it all, especially when the Great Recession, spawned by the U.S. economy, impacted them. The result has been that unemployment went up with large numbers of government employees and private sector employees being laid off. Government employees protested in some violent demonstrations when the government said they had to raise the retirement age and apply other necessary changes. The two countries where this has been most prominent have been Greece and Spain, however, Italy, Ireland, France and Belgium joined in.

It's really quite simple. We want everything, don't want to give up anything, BUT don't want to pay any more money in taxes to keep taking. "Don't cut our wages. Don't cut our cushy hours and vacations. Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! I don't care how you get the money, that's your problem. Just gimme more." That is the cry of the masses of people who have relinquished their freedom (and don't even realize it) in exchange for security and handouts.

The U.S. is facing precisely the same set of circumstances. Now, the narcissistic leaders in Congress and the White House want the masses to believe they are going to solve the problem by supposedly cutting deficit spending by some minute fraction of the total spending and taxing the wealthiest part of the population. This is pretty much the same thing as you or me wracking up a $100,000 credit card debt and only paying the minimum due on the monthly statement, while continuing to spend at a higher rate each year. It won't work. So, why is it that a simpleton like me, using basic elementary school and high school arithmetic can understand this, but the mass of the population doesn't get it. And worse yet, is it that the narcissists in Congress and the White House don't get it either (that's very scary) or in the words of our out-going Secretary of State,"What difference at this point does it make?"

I caught a clip on the news last night about the Pentagon planning to furlough all their civilian federal employees one day each week without pay to save 20% of their annual payroll for civilian employees. The employees are already protesting and it hasn't even been officially announced. Sounds just like Greece, Spain and the other European countries. How about if we cut back all the salaries of Congress men and women and their staffs, cut the president's, vice-president's, cabinet members and all of their staff members by 20%? How about if we eliminated paid holidays, vacations, sick days, maternal or paternal maternity leave, personal days and pay for days when the government closes for bad weather? How about if we pared back their pension plans increased the amount of time in service to qualify for retirement pensions and made sure they were on the same healthcare plans as the rest of the population. By the way, it's the rest of the population who have to work to generate the money to pay the federal payroll and benefits?

We can, of course, carry this down to state and local government employees, too. The private sector already knows how this feels, but they're going to have to bite the bullet more, too. Maybe some jobs will need to be consolidated in the government sector. Maybe we need to close down some government departments and agencies that are redundant. Why not sell off all the surplus government property, buildings, resources and equipment that is tying up and costing capital.

I'll tell you what will happen. The Occupy Wall Street protests will look like a Kindergarten recess at an elementary school. The excuses from the Pentagon civilian employees as to why they can't take cuts are flying like crazy - I have kids in college (so do private sector parents); I have a sick spouse, husband, whoever (so do private sector employees); I won't be able to pay all my bills (so do private sector employees and why are you living outside your means???); etc., etc. Of course, it doesn't matter that the civilian counterparts in the private sector have been enduring this for at least the past five years. It doesn't matter that many of the private sector folks have lost their pensions, IRA's, 401k's, health insurance plans and even their jobs - and now they're going to have to pay a "tax that will not be treated as a tax" penalty if they can't afford to buy private health insurance.

We'll see work stoppages and work slowdowns. We'll see government employees going on strike (like Greece and Spain). Sure, it's against federal law for federal employees to strike against the government, but since government employees are represented by unions (Only 11.3% of the entire U.S. workforce is currently members of a union and by far the largest number are government employees), they will do it anyway. The government won't have the manpower to arrest the strikers, detention facilities, courts and prosecutors to try them nor the prisons to incarcerate them for their breach of federal law. So, it will be a moot point.

It's All Very Predictable

Additionally, let's consider the unfortunate people in New York, New Jersey, Connecticut and other states severely impacted by Superstorm Sandy. Their losses are unimaginable. Those unfortunate Superstorm Sandy folks are now whining, crying and becoming more belligerently vocal because the federal government hasn't dropped all the myriad of other priorities to give them money that doesn't even exist. Predictably, it's the same thing that happened with the Hurricane Katrina victims.

But, is it really the responsibility of the rest of the citizens, who chose not to live in high risk locations, to provide the funds for rebuilding these homes and businesses in the same risky location? Consider how much help the farmers and residents of areas along the large navigable rivers receive when those rivers flood. They know they're going to flood. They have to account for that. Most of their assistance comes from their own resources. How about people who build homes in idyllic mountains and forest lands where wild fires are regular occurrences?

It simply has no end. And, the sad thing is that, except for the two fringe groups, no one else seems to get it. If you want freedom, you have to be responsible and accountable for your own actions. If I do something stupid, that's my responsibility. If I choose to live a lifestyle I can't afford and my job is eliminated, it's not my employer's responsibility nor is it the responsibility of my neighbors or the productive revenue generating parts of society (which the government is not and suckles off, is never weaned from and continues to become more and more insatiable).

Predictability! While I don't condemn the majority of the population who have bought into the system (we've all been sold a bill of goods by the narcissists), I also cannot feel sorry for them. Just as I've made choices in my life that were detrimental, so have they. But, I don't look for them to take responsibility for my choices, right or wrong. Therefore, I predictably see the world continuing down this predictable road to perdition, still believing that 2+2=22. They won't understand why they are in pain, why they are sliding backwards and why, sometime in the future, it will all come crashing down like a house of cards. Life is predictable.   

Step #10 Giving

Step 10 of the 12 Steps for Living Free is Giving. As I contemplated what giving means, I did some research. I found that giving is another of those words that have a multitude of definitions and uses. It’s another single concept that could have an entire book written about it. Perhaps I may tackle that book as a future project. For the immediate purposes of Step #10, I’m going to focus on just a few aspects of giving. Focusing some time, energy and resources on any of these facets of giving will definitively result in a freer and happier life. 

“If you have much, give of your wealth; if you have little, give of your heart.”

That statement is an old Arab proverb. I define it in very simple terms. Everyone can be a giver. The rewards of giving are not reserved for people with financial wealth and material abundance. Unfortunately, some people give for absolutely the wrong reasons. Giving must be done with a pureness of heart and intention. You give because you want to help or bestow some form of joy on another person. You give with no consideration of return or reward.

In my life I have identified three basic kinds of people. The first are givers. The second are takers. The third are receivers. A true giver always gives with no expectation of receiving anything in return. The taker is a person who, knowingly and purposely, takes something from another that was not freely offered and has only the taker’s own fulfillment in mind with little or no consideration for the person who has been exploited. The receiver is a person who is not specifically seeking anything, but humbly accepts whatever it is and is joyful in being the recipient of someone’s generosity. Interestingly, most givers have a difficult time receiving anything from anyone. They are just not prepared to receive.

However, there is an interesting dynamic that appears to be pretty universal when it comes to giving and receiving. A giver can never give more then he or she will ultimately receive. Remember, I said a giver gives freely, from the heart, in conjunction with the mind.  The giver has no conscious intention or desire to receive anything in return, however, he or she has no choice in this matter. Givers will virtually always receive more then they give, tangibly and intangibly. It’s much like the concept of sowing and reaping the harvest. The more you plant and tend to your garden the more it will reward you in the harvest.

There are many examples of giving. In a Christian religious context God gave his only son so that all who accepted this sacrifice or gift will have eternal life. A mother gives birth to a child she carried in her womb with no expectation of repayment or compensation from the child she bore. A father gives his child an education so the child has an opportunity for a successful life. A person hands a homeless person some money or perhaps a coupon for a free meal. None of these individuals gave with the intention of any payback, compensation or reward. Yet, each of them, including God, received fulfillment and joy from freely giving.

Giving requires a pure intention. Because you are fortunate enough to be wealthy, giving money, cars, expensive clothes and other tangible stuff seems like the generous thing to give to a spouse or offspring when all they may have needed and would have preferred to have was some of your time and attention. In this instance, giving expensive stuff may actually resemble a bribe or an attempt to reduce your own guilt for withholding time, attention and love for whatever reason.

Of course, wealth does have its privilege. There are many stories of wealthy individuals who anonymously give gifts of money or resources to individuals who can truly benefit from whatever forms the gift may take. Perhaps it is a deserving young person who could never attend college or a training school of some kind due to a lack of financial resources. Then, out of the kindness and consideration of some individual with substantial wealth, this young person receives a scholarship or grant. Maybe a condition of accepting the gift is that the recipient must perform some kind of service for a community or state or country. Another possibility is that the individual has to pay the grant or scholarship forward to some other deserving individual in the future. This is a gift that keeps giving.

On the flip side of the coin, you may be from an average or a poverty level financial circumstance. You can’t afford to shower the subject of your generosity with anything that costs money. However, you give your time to the individual or knit or make some new clothes for him or her. You give what you can, but you do it from the heart. And, whether you like it or not, you’re going to experience joy, fulfillment, respect and love in return. Again, you’re not demanding, asking or expecting anything. It just happens. It’s a form of universal law similar to the law of nature that states as you sow, so shall you reap. But, your rewards, however they may manifest themselves, often are greater then what you have given, even though you expected nothing.

Giving to Family

Your family is the first and most obvious object of your giving. The amazing thing is that what is most desired by the family members is that which is often withheld for various reasons. Your time, attention, caring and love are the most valuable gifts you can give to your family. It doesn’t matter if they are your children, your parents, your siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins or in-laws. Since time is a priceless commodity, how valuable is the time you give your child reading to him or her? How about playing a simple game of catch or taking your children by the hand and walking through a zoo and teaching them about the animals? How important will he or she feel when you let him or her help while you’re baking cookies? Just giving each of your children some of your time and attention is a gift that is priceless.

Unfortunately, in our current world, where both parents often either must work or choose to have careers, children end up playing second or third fiddle. You don’t mean for it to be that way, but the demands of the job too often supercede the needs of the family. So, you place them in the care of nannies, babysitters, daycare services, after school programs and grandparents to mention a few. You buy them “things” and “stuff” as a way of paying penance or bribing them. Since a child’s personality and most basic set of values are formed during the first seven years of his or her life, what are you teaching them? When they demand attention, they throw a fit, make a scene and you give them what they want – more stuff. Their value system begins to form and they learn that whenever they are not happy or discontent, just get more stuff. This is never the solution. But, the children don’t know any better and they, ultimately, pass this learned behavior and value system to their own spouse and children, and the cycle repeats. Money and what it can buy is used to substitute for the most valuable gifts of all – time, attention and love.

This same concept holds true for siblings, parents, grandparents, adult offspring, aunts, uncles and cousins. I see people and families where they spend massive amounts of time and money seeking expensive gifts that are just right for the intended recipient. But, ultimately, it’s just stuff. And, since the stuff is free to the recipient, they tend to place little value on it. Often we hear stories of children or spouses going into the closets, drawers, attic and so on, of a close family member who has passed away. In those storage places they find years of gifts that were given to the individual that were never worn or used. The gifts may even be tagged with the name of the person who gave the gift along with the date and occasion it was received. Ultimately, it was just so much more stuff. The major beneficiaries of the gifts were the manufacturers, supply chain and the retailers.

Telephone calls, short visits, window shopping, going to a ball game, taking a ride to a favorite picnic location, a personal note, a gift of photographs of an event you shared together, a favorite homemade food dish and so many other simple things that mostly take a little precious time and show your love and attention are all the kinds of things you can give and make someone feel loved and important. And, here’s the best part. You’re going to enjoy doing whatever it is and when you receive a big smile, a hug, perhaps a few tears or whatever other responses will express the recipient’s pleasure, you’re going to gain more happiness and joy then you can imagine. The best part is that you never tire or get used to those feelings of happiness and joy.

The most valuable gift anyone can receive is self-esteem. In our current society I see parents and grandparents who, unknowingly, are undermining the newer generation’s self-esteem. While we are human beings and live, supposedly, civilized lives in societies we have created, at our most basic core, by nature, we are part of the animal kingdom. There is a natural course that nature prescribes. One generation creates the next generation. The older generation ages and passes away. The next generation must now take the responsibility to create the next generation and like the prior generation they will age and pass away. This cycle has repeated itself since animal life appeared on this planet.

However, due to science, medical advances and technology, it’s not unusual to see four or even five generations alive. Remarkable! But, there seems to be a trend towards continuing to keep second and even third generations in the nest. Parents are still supporting 30 and 40 something offspring (and often their grandkids) who haven’t figured out how to fly on their own, yet. In the natural scheme of things, you are not helping these younger generations to become stronger. In fact, it ultimately undermines their self-esteem, their self-worth and their ability to survive in a difficult and unfair world. You can’t make this world any easier for them. By carrying their burden you are weakening them and reducing their natural survival instinct and abilities.

You simply need to look at your own life at age 18, 20, 24 and realize that you were on your own. Life was tough. It wasn’t a bed of roses. You learned that life wasn’t fair and you had to carry your own weight. You learned to survive and are proud of that fact. But, by “supposedly” making life easier for your offspring, you actually deprive them of a vitally important necessity of life . . . the natural ability to survive. Survival requires an ability to deal with adversity, think critically and apply creativity. Yes! They need your support. But, they need moral support not fiscal support.

By the time they are young adults you should have taught them the basic necessities of independence, responsibility, accountability and survival. Now, just like you, they need to jump out of the nest, flap their wings and fly. If they fall or fly into a wall, they need to pick themselves up, dust themselves off and try all over again (and yes, those words are part of the lyrics from an old song). The longer you are their financial support, the harder it is for them to make the break. Eventually, this is going to potentially place you in financial hardship when you need it most. You’re also going to begin developing a degree of resentment, perhaps, subtle and underlying, but you’re going to want your own life, after all, you EARNED it. To see exactly how we have weakened our society you simply need to look at the welfare programs and the massive number of entitled people who are exploiting them. We have created a society of “takers.” Give the gift of self-esteem and self-worth. Enough said.

The happiest families I have witnessed are those who learned from the earliest age not to give or expect “stuff” (although they all did give and receive some, in appropriate proportion), but to give and expect time, attention and love. I see these families gather from far and wide and have more fun, more laughter and more fulfilling times together then any other families. Oh, and it doesn’t matter where the family is on the financial curve. Time, attention and love are priceless and everyone can both give and receive them.

Giving to Friends

Friends are a gift in themselves. As soon as we are old enough to meet the little boy or girl next door, we begin developing and nurturing friendships. Friends, often become our family, especially in instances where the dysfunction in family relationships, unfortunately, drives family members away from each other. While it may be true that family members may share the same blood and gene pool, there is no way to know what specific combination of genes each member of the family will have. Thus, three children born of the same parents may look amazingly alike; yet have very different predispositions, abilities, talents, intelligence and so on. Likewise, all the siblings may look decidedly different from one another yet have very similar predispositions. And, of course, they may all look very different and have totally different predispositions. And all, some or none of them may be anything like their parents. This is an ongoing area of study.

Be that as it may, we have no control over these matters, though there are those who continue to think by breeding a perfect mother with a perfect father a perfect child should be the result. Here is where an old saying still and will always apply. “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.” And, it means exactly what it says. You may not like your parents or your siblings or both for that matter. But, you don’t have any choice in the matter and that pretty much is true for adoptive family situations. Friends on the other hand are a different story. You don’t choose to be friends with people you don’t like or don’t want to be around. You choose friends because they are complementary. You are drawn together because each of you provides something in the relationship that makes each friend more and better because of the connection. You develop levels of trust that you may not have with your own family members. Developing these friendships is a trial and error process. From your earliest age you’ll create friends and then you’ll grow in different directions and you’ll create new friends. By the way, there is also the great possibility that you’ll create lifelong friendships with your siblings and your parents, which, of course, is much to be desired.

It is said that some people will come into your life for a specific reason, while others will remain with you for a season and finally, others will be with you for a lifetime. I might dare to say that there will be more who will be with you for a specific reason and then be gone. A lesser number will be with you for a season. The smallest number will be those who come into your life for a lifetime. First, each of these people who come into your life are a gift. Each of you will leave the other with some kind of gift. And the lifetime friends will continue gifting one another for their entire lifetime.

What kind of gifts do you give to friends? Of course, there are the tangible gifts. But, again, this is just so much stuff and its true value is more about the thought and feelings that caused the gift to be given then the tangible item itself. The real gifts between friends are the same as I mentioned earlier; time, attention, support, caring and love. How often has a friend been there just to listen when you needed someone to listen? How often has a friend been there lending moral support when you’ve been going through a rough patch in life. How often has a friend been there when you’ve enjoyed a trip somewhere and wanted someone to travel with you. The list goes on and on. And, of course, you have been that friend giving to your friends on the same level. Perhaps you may agree with me based on your own experiences in life, but my wealth is not measured in dollars and cents, it’s measured in my friendships. Friends who “give” to one another are true friends. Friends who “take” from you are not your friends, though they may deceive you into thinking you need them, but you don’t. They are leeches. They will use you until you either can no longer supply them with what they want, you deny them or a better “host” appears on the scene.

Giving to Community

First, let’s define community since this can be interpreted on a very broad base. Community, by my definition is the country, state, county, city, town, village or neighborhood you live in. It is one or more organizations and institutions within any of these jurisdictions that provide uplifting to the jurisdiction at large or any segment of it. It can be a homeless individual. It can be a family that has lost its primary income source. It can be an animal or nature conservancy. You can make this list as long as you desire. I would suggest, however, that with living free mentality, it probably wouldn’t necessarily be large, high profile charitable organizations.

Giving to community should be something you feel at your very core. I stated before, givers don’t give with expectations of anything in return. However, while the work of large, charitable organizations, religious organizations and other similar organizations does benefit society in general, these organizations involve a lot of bureaucracy and have very significant operating expenses and much of the money and resources that go to them is used to feed the bureaucracy and defray the operating expenses. When you have chosen to live free you are typically avoiding these kinds of involvements and organizations. There is something very special about knowing in your heart that something you did today is going to put a pair of shoes on a specific child or know that a specific person will get to their chemotherapy appointment today or people you know (not necessarily by name or acquaintance) will laugh or cry tonight at a theatrical performance or musical event and the list goes on.

Giving to community doesn’t mean giving money, either. My most valuable, actually, priceless, commodity is my time. Perhaps you consider your time priceless, too. So, most of the time, I feel that if I can “tithe” my time, I’m giving something that is worth far more then some pieces of paper with some colored ink on them. But, there are plenty of others who will gladly give colored pieces of paper so they don’t have to commit their time. So, if that’s what works for them, so be it. I’ll provide time.

I’m also a strong believer in “paying it forward.” There was a movie a number of years ago titled Pay It Forward that exemplified this concept. While the movie, starring Kevin Spacey, Helen Hunt and others didn’t receive glowing reviews; it does plant the seeds of an idea. Another movie made for TV was produced from a true story of a young boy in the Philadelphia suburbs who found a way of receiving donations of blankets (that was the main item I remember) and going to the inner city every weekend with his parents to pass out the blankets to homeless people during the cold winter months. I only mention these two movies to suggest the kinds of things one can consider when giving to his or her community. Certainly, your knowledge of your own area and your creativity can generate many ideas like these.

The bottom line is that giving to your community, however large or small you define it, is another way to gain the joy and happiness of giving without expectation of return.

What About The Taker?

There will always be takers in this world. I only admonish you to beware. Takers will use any disguise they need to use to take what they want from whomever they choose. Learn to recognize takers. It’s actually pretty easy. Anytime you find yourself in a relationship with someone and you don’t feel that you’re gaining anything positive or you find that you’re the only one contributing, then it’s a pretty sure bet you’re being exploited by a taker. Takers don’t necessarily take money or resources. They can also drain you intellectually and emotionally.

DO NOT be concerned about hurting the taker’s feelings. That’s a ploy they use very effectively and it’s called “guilt.” Believe me, the only feelings you’re going to hurt are those of your true friends who watch you being taken down the primrose path. That taker will find a new host before you’ve had a chance to even think about what just transpired. And here’s another tip. Don’t be surprised at who may be a taker. They are often much closer then you’d imagine. The result of this kind of relationship is that they gain what they want and you’re left drained. 

Who Are Receivers?

Receivers are another kind of person entirely. Receivers are those who do not exploit anyone for anything. However, they do know how to graciously receive gifts when they are offered. These people may be those who are down on their luck and truly appreciate when someone gives them something that will make the receiver’s life better. But, a receiver may also be someone who is very well to do financially, intellectually and emotionally. When someone finds a way to give something beneficial to a receiver who is fortunate enough to have some prosperity, the receiver will be just as gracious, humble and appreciative as a hungry homeless person. Receivers are the people you want to be giving to. Most often, they will have a need that you are able to help them with, even the prosperous receivers. And, whether your giving is anonymous or not, you’ll know that your effort will be appreciated. 

Here’s the interesting circumstance I mentioned earlier. Givers usually have a very difficult time receiving. Givers are so accustomed to giving and not expecting anything that when someone gifts the giver, he or she doesn’t know how to accept it. 

You, as a giver, need to be a grateful and gracious receiver. 

There is an art to receiving. As a giver, at various times during your lifetime, you will be recognized for your generosity. You will be given awards. You may receive various kinds of gifts in appreciation of all that you have done in giving to others to make their lives better. These gifts are given to you from the hearts of those who are recognizing you. You should not feel any guilt or embarrassment. 

Remember, I said that no matter how much you give, you would always receive more in return then you can imagine. Most of what you’ll receive will be in the form of personal joy, happiness, fulfillment and peace of mind. However, people will recognize your contributions and want to give you these tokens of appreciation for your selflessness. 

Also, there may come a time in your own life, after giving freely and lovingly to others where you may find yourself in a position of needing something. Other givers will want to be there for you. Learn how to humbly and graciously accept the gifts and be truly appreciative. You deserve it. 

Being a true giver, learning to graciously receive from other givers and avoiding the takers and being taken for granted will result in rewards you can’t imagine. But, the main reward will be the freedom, happiness, well-being and contentment you’ll ultimately enjoy.