The Reason WHY . . . Part II

Sunrise over the Gulf of Mexico on Padre Island National Seashore, Texas

The photo opening this post is from my current “yard.” I'm writing this from the beach of the Gulf of Mexico on the Padre Island (Texas) National Seashore. I awoke to a beautiful sunrise and slept last night to the sound of the surf. Today, my background inspiration, as I compose this article, is the surf (it's low tide), the breeze and the occasional sounds of a variety of birds on a beautiful sunny day with blue skies and a few puffy white clouds. I'm sitting comfortably at my desk in My McVansion. You won't read this until sometime after I've left this beautiful location since I don't have any wireless phone or Internet connection here. Another respite to enjoy.

You also see a photo of the My McVansion galley. I enjoyed a couple cups of Chai tea, a banana, some cantaloupe and I made myself a bagel sandwich flavored with maple syrup and an egg seasoned the way I like it, with melted cheese and smoked sausage to top it off. It was a magnificent breakfast and will probably carry me to dinner time, with, perhaps, a light snack to carry me over. Does it sound like I'm enjoying my life? Indeed! The big question in my mind is why (there's that word again) I didn't do this a lot sooner . . . or maybe for my entire life.

Here's a thought for you. If you are asking yourself 'why' about a lot of things in your past and current life, you likely have some serious, unresolved issues. It's my personal intention to reach the “final destination” (the same one we all arrive at, ultimately) with the greatest memories of all I did during my brief lifespan and not regretting all the things I never did, but always wanted to. Too many people end up bitter, if they live long enough, because they feel they were robbed or deprived of so many things they always wanted to do. But, in fact, they were neither robbed nor deprived. They made conscious choices to do and accept what their life turned out to be.

Why Do You Live Where You Live?

Photo-of-the-Week #228 Sunset over Los Angeles, Los Angeles, California, January 2015

What can I say? I just love sunrises and sunsets and here's another example of a majestic sunset. I took this photo from one of the highest points in Los Angeles' Griffith Park, just below the Griffith Observatory. This was early evening, probably around 6:05 PM on January 8, 2015 to be precise. . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #209 Desert at Dusk, Desert East of Yucca Valley, California, April 2015

Serendipity!

This is one of those shots that just . . . happened. I was cruising along at Dusk on my way to Yucca Valley, California, my stopover destination between Lake Havasu City, Arizona and Hawthorne (L.A.) California. . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #193 - Griffith Observatory, Griffith Park, Los Angeles, California, January 2015

Here is the Griffith Observatory. The Observatory is prominently located on what may be the highest point in Griffith Park on Mount Hollywood, a 3,000 plus acre preserve donated to the city of Los Angeles in 1896 by Col. Griffith J. Griffith. In his will he also left the funding to build the observatory with detailed specifications. The observatory was built in the mid 1930's as a WPA project during the Great Depression. It was officially opened to the public on May 14, 1935. It is and has always been free to the public in accordance with Griffith's will. . . READ MORE

The Good, The Bad, But There Is No Ugly Today

So, the good is that while My McVansion has suffered an automotive heart attack, I'm fortunate enough to have close family in an idyllic location, especially considering the weather conditions back at my eastern base camp in Keyser, West Virginia. The temperatures there for the past several days have been in the 0-10 degree range at night with 25 to 50 mph winds creating wind-chill temperatures in the -10 to -20 range. Additionally, they have had a nominal blanket of snow on the ground. . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #179 Just Another Sunset, Ocean Pond, Osceola National Forest, Florida, February 2014

So, here we are at sunset, just before the golden disk disappears behind the horizon. This series begins several minutes before sunset and several minutes after. But, this one just seemed to stand out for this week's choice. The location is the campground on Ocean Pond in the Osceola National Forest in north central Florida and the time was the end of February of this year, 2014. . . READ MORE

Photo-of-the-Week #148 - Another Sunset from Paradise, Ocean Pond, Osceola National Forest, Florida, February 2014

Okay! You know I love to photograph sunrises and sunsets. I just happen to believe they are some of the most majestic representations of God's, Mother Nature's or however you want to describe an artist so awesome as to be able to create this. And, of course, it's not created just once, but over and over again since the beginning of time. And, no two of them are alike.

This was taken just after the sun went behind the tree line the night before last. Everyone at the Ocean Pond stopped whatever they were doing and watched this moving spectacle. There's not much really to say except, I'm very glad I was there and that I had my camera close at hand. 

Postcard from Paradise . . .

Greetings from Paradise!

Sunrise over Ocean Pond 

Being a free spirited, living free, wandering traveler can be tough work. After all, awakening to duck calls and other birds in time to watch the sunrise over a beautiful natural lake is rough duty.

So, here I am, located in the Ocean Pond campground in Osceola National Forest in north central Florida. As you can tell from the location of My McVansion, it's a low population density neighborhood. 

In the morning there may be a little fog on the lake like delicate lace.

My McVansion with the morning fog over Ocean Pond

The View from my Office/Studio

As you can see from the view from my office/studio French doors, it's a very laid back, relaxing work environment. Later in the day, it's clear with a brilliant sun and blue skies filled with puffy white clouds, moderate temperatures and gentle breezes. The tall trees surrounding My McVansion provide shade from the heat of the afternoon sun.

My quacking friends and an assortment of their chirping friends and some frogs and squirrels are my neighbors. There's an occasional lizard or two and the infrequent alligator and bear, though they generally avoid us human kind (unless we leave some food outside).

My closest neighbors - sometimes a little rowdy

. . . and then there's the sunset over Ocean Pond . . . 

And then comes the majestic beauty of a sky painted by a being with an unlimited palette of color and an artistic genius no mere mortal could approach as the sun sets on the other end of Ocean Pond and resolves into a blackness lit up by a billion, billion stars throughout the universe.

So, this, my friends, is my lifestyle . . . this week. I have no idea what beauty will be revealed next week or what new, interesting and unique people will cross my path. As I said at the beginning of this postcard, this is tough work, but someone has to do it and yours truly is up for the task. I hope your life is as fantastic and blessed as mine is.

Enthusiastically,

Ed 

Photo-of-the-Week #135 Fishing Boat At Sunset, Durham New Hampshire, November 2007

This is simply a relaxing, serene scene. As you know, I enjoy taking photos of sunrises and sunsets. This photo of a fishing boat at anchor near Durham, New Hampshire represents another aspect of sunsets. While this is a large body of water, it is very still and mirror-like. I liked the muted blues, purples and pinks in the sky and in the water reflection. It was a somewhat overcast sunset with broken clouds. Since the photo was taken in mid November, this was fairly early in the evening, probably around 4:00 PM. It also gave me the feeling of the impending winter that was just around the corner. 

Are You Too Busy To . . .

talk with friends and family on the phone, by email or in person?

watch a movie either on TV or in the theater?

spend quality time with your spouse, significant other, children?

enjoy reading a good book just for pleasure?

prepare a special meal of one of your favorite dishes and savor it?

sit outside with a cup of coffee or tea, a glass of wine or some fine Scotch, bourbon or brandy and watch the sun rise or set?

visit a park, shopping mall, the downtown of a small town and simply people watch?

go on a road trip, tour, cruise or climb Mt. Everest?

practice the lost art of doing absolutely NOTHING?

to LIVE the ONLY LIFE you have - NOW - IN THE PRESENT?

You can add your own questions to this list. I'm sure there are many things you can think of that you often tell people that you're too busy to do.

Whose Fault Is It That We're Too Busy?

In our society there is never enough time. Of course, whose fault is that? I'm sure you'd like to blame your job or family responsibilities or commitments of all kinds you make to others that you really didn't want to do and don't want to do, but you continue to make these commitments. These commitments can be to all kinds of things of value like to your church or religious organization, to the PTA if you have kids in school, to the community theater in your town, to the Boy (Cub) Scouts, Girl (Brownies) Scouts and similar as a scout leader. Perhaps you are involved in local politics or as an officer of your home owners association. Maybe you're a little league baseball, soccer or football coach. Again, you can add as many things to this list as you can think of that impact your personal time.

So, here's the question. If you don't do all these things that take up your time, will the world come to an end? Will our society crumble if you choose taking time for yourself as opposed to being committed to so many outside drains on your time, energy and resources? I've said this before in this blog and I'll say it again, this life is not a dress rehearsal. This is the performance of a lifetime - YOUR lifetime. And here's the kicker, none of us know when the curtain is coming down on our performance.

Oh, you say, I'll get to it when the family is grown and out of the nest. Well, in the typical family of three children, that's between 22 and 30 years of your "performance." Or, you'll say, well, I'll have plenty of time to do that when I retire. Well, there goes 40 to 45 years of your performance - IF you are in a position to retire when you think you'd like to or if you even make it to retirement age. It doesn't matter what the commitment is that you've made, it all requires time, energy and resources.

Self-centered or Honest?

So, am I saying you should be totally self-centered and not participate in any of the other activities I've mentioned or the many more you can add to the list? I'm not suggesting that at all. I simply asked the question are you too busy? How can you answer that question honestly? Remember, living free means we get to make all our own choices and decisions about out own time, energy, resources and life. If you feel you're too busy, there is absolutely no one to blame for that except yourself and you can change it.

I remember, many years ago, when a friend and colleague in a multi-level marketing business I was involved in for a number of years asked me to do something for him. When I arrived at the meeting we were both attending, he asked me if I had done whatever it was he had requested me to do. I hadn't and I replied with a pretty typical answer (excuse), "No! I didn't have time to do it." He responded to me, saying, "Don't you mean you didn't MAKE time to do it?" The truth is, I didn't make the time because I was too busy doing too many other things, any number of which were very likely not as important as fulfilling his request. And to be brutally honest, I'd have to say I really didn't want to do what he requested, so I didn't make time to do it. Why didn't I just say, "No, I don't choose to do this." rather then accepting an obligation I didn't want to fulfill?

I don't know about you, but I've spent most of my life being too busy. I hate that some of us allow five, six and seven decades go by before we figure out that we're too busy because we don't MAKE the time to do the things we want to do for ourselves.

Grandparents Exploited

I've dated a few women over the years who were delightful and wonderful company. They were grandparents (to be honest, I'm not yet a grandparent). Everything they wanted to do had to be arranged around their children's and grandchildren's schedules.  It might have been babysitting, attending two or three soccer games in a day once or twice a week, picking the grandchildren up after school, watching them while the parents went away on a business trip or vacation for two. Basically, while I very much enjoyed these women and their companionship, I wasn't interested in having my life and my planning of events I believed that we'd both enjoy sharing to be controlled by their children and grandchildren.

These were choices these lovely women made and I make no judgment about their choices. However, their choices shouldn't impact my choices. In some instances, women I've dated had no problem with me getting to know their friends, families and even ex-husbands, but they didn't want to spend time with my friends, family or former spouse in situation such as a family wedding or similar. So, I went alone. My choice.

Maybe you're a grand parent or a parent. And, okay, I'm not. Would I feel any differently if I were? Well, to be frank and honest, NO! I wouldn't feel different. Once again, as a grandparent, you (and I) have raised a family. We've sacrificed a significant part of our lives. Now, the way the system works is that if our offspring choose (again, parenthood is a choice) to have and raise a family, that is their choice and shouldn't deter me from enjoying the natural freedom we are all born with. I am certainly not saying that grandparents shouldn't spend time or want to spend time with their grandchildren. I'm simply saying that, again, how much time and when you want to spend that time should be YOUR choice and not controlled by your offspring or the grandchildren.

We are too busy because we allow others to impose their needs, desires and will on us. I've even seen offspring use grandchildren as pawns in a game of extortion. If you don't fulfill our needs and requirements, we won't allow you to see your grandchildren. That's criminal and exploitation at its worst. I've even seen offspring exploit their parents for the inheritance long before the parents pass away.

Exploitation, Excuses or Choices

There are many things that we can use as excuses for being too busy, but everyone of them is of our own choosing. So, let's think about this realistically. I'm speaking to young people beginning in their late teens, 20's and up and those from my age bracket and beyond. If you don't feel free and you're too busy, whose responsible for that? Correct! You are. You made the choices. If you want to live freer and gain the most personal fulfillment from the "performance of your lifetime," who can make that happen? Correct, again! YOU can.

The world or our society or your town or your neighborhood or your family is not going to crumble around you because you choose to be freer and enjoy this limited engagement of this play called "My Life." Sure, some may be inconvenienced, but that's really and truly NOT your problem. They are responsible for their own lives and the choices they've made. To be sure, there will be a lot of people, especially family and friends, who will do their best to lay guilt trips on you. Once again, if you accept those guilt trips, that's your choice. But, you are not responsible for their lives, challenges, schedule conflicts, responsibilities, obligations, freedom or happiness. Those are theirs to bear based on choices they made. They are performing in their own limited engagement of "Their Lives."

Just Say NO!

Learn the very difficult act of saying "NO!" when someone, anyone, regardless of their relationship to you, requests, expects or demands something of you that is not your responsibility whether it's at work, in the community, family or whatever. You'll see that, magically, whatever it is, will still get accomplished if it's that important . . . without you.

Take that exciting cruise or tour that is a once in a lifetime opportunity over the holidays. Learn to use Skype and share the holiday through the magic of the Internet with the kids and grandkids from wherever you may be. Go enjoy Disney World and Epcot center (you're still a kid no matter what your age) on your schedule. Watch those sunrises and sunsets. Read those books you've been putting off for months or years. Go see those movies that catch your attention or just have your own James Bond (or any other) movie marathon at home with the phone turned off. Learn the lost art of doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING . . . because you can.

And, whatever you do, DON'T buy into guilt - read or reread Step 8 on Relationships and Step 9 on Amends (and guilt).

There is never a good reason to be "too busy" to enjoy the limited engagement of "My Life," the performance of YOUR lifetime. 

Photo-of-the-Week #72 – Church Steeple at Dusk – Charleston, South Carolina, December 2004

This is certainly not one of the more technically better photos in my collection, but I enjoy “pushing the envelope” to see what I can actually capture in a challenging situation. The photo was taken toward the transition of dusk to night and was shot with available light and the camera was handheld. There is certainly noise in the photo, but I still like it.

In some ways it is a bit eerie. In other ways it represents a certain peacefulness that we experience at the end of another day. I guess it relates to my fascination with sunrises and sunsets. The beginning and the end. The alpha and the omega. While someone familiar with the landmarks of historic Charleston would likely be able to identify the church attached to this steeple, I honestly don’t recall anything about it. It probably didn’t even catch my attention during the daylight hours. Since this was in early December, this was likely shot around 5:45 to 6:00 PM.

Another thing about this photo is that it brings back childhood memories of the Peter Pan story looking out of Wendy’s bedroom window over London. Somehow, this just feels like what I would see looking out that bedroom window. Imagination? Of course it is. But, isn’t imagination a wonderful gift? We see things through our minds’ eyes and our hearts, as we want them to be. In this time of global unrest and chaos, sometimes an imaginary trip is just what we need to get up and face the next day. I’m not sure how those people living in extremely dangerous parts of the world cope on a day-to-day basis, but somehow I want to believe that through it all, their imaginations take them to places they’ll never see or experience. 

Photo-of-the-Week #71 – Sunset Over The Sound, Duck, North Carolina – March 2008

You know I’m attracted by sunsets and sunrises. So, here is another glorious, late winter sunset I captured in early March of 2008. I have a friend who owns a unique time-sharing arrangement in a beachfront community in Duck, North Carolina. Periodically, when he and his family can’t utilize some of their allocated time at the beautiful four-bedroom house, he makes it available to his friends. Thankfully, I count among those he considers friends and have, on several occasions, taken advantage of his offer.

The boundary island (Bodie Island) where the small resort town of Duck is located is very narrow. Accordingly, the Paine House is strategically located between the sound, separating the island from the mainland on the west and the Atlantic Ocean on the east. So, when I’m there, I have access to both beautiful sunrises and sunsets. I’ve also been there in the summer, fall and winter. I don’t believe I’ve made it during the spring, yet.

This shot was taken just as the sun set behind the tree-lined landscape on the mainland shore on the western side of the Currituck sound. If you look carefully, you can still see just a tiny pinpoint of the direct sunlight just about dead center in the photo. I hope I don’t bore you with these occasional sunset/sunrise photos, but they are very inspiring to me. Each sunrise represents a new opportunity and another glorious day of life on this unique piece of space dust we call Earth. Each sunset represents the end of a day, a time for resting and reflecting on the events and achievements of the day, be they great or small.

During this time of turmoil – economic, political, social and so on – these sunrises and sunsets remind me of the personal freedom each of us has if we choose to exercise it, no matter what our individual, unique definitions of freedom are. Each day that the sun rises (even when hidden behind a cloudy sky) is an opportunity to express ourselves in whatever way suits us and each day that the sun sets (even behind some clouds) we can reflect after a day well-lived, no matter what we did, and can now rest with the anticipation of a new and different sunrise to follow.